Donald Trump to Royals: Remember When I Tried to Bang Princess Di?

Donald Trump to Royals: Remember When I Tried to Bang Princess Di?

Someday in the near future, when you and your family are gathered around a flickering Coleman lantern, digesting the golden retriever you enjoyed for dinner in the nightmarish hellscape that was once America, your children will ask you how Donald Trump came to be president in the first place.

As you have so many times before, you'll explain that it all started in the Eighties -- a time when the country was rich, the clothing was hideous, and douchebags reigned supreme.

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