After recent claims that Farrah Abraham is an out-of-control drunk, the last thing that Teen Mom fans want to see is any additional children under her care.
On Thursday, Farrah made an ominous reference on social media to the "bun" in her "oven." She was not talking about baking.
Is Farrah ... pregnant?
Thursday, July 26, Farrah wrote a message in her Instagram Live story. It was a message that sent chills down the spines of her followers and set off alarm bells in their minds.
"The bun that’s in my oven is my business," Farrah wrote.
Fans covered their mouths in horror, because when you say that you have a bun in the oven, that expression almost always means that the person is pregnant.
The only other meaning in English is that there is literally a bun in a literal oven, but because of the prominence of the euphemism for pregnancy, people usually find another way to say that.
Teen Mom fans, who would not want to see any additional children condemned to have their whole worlds revolve around Farrah, were shaken.
Fortunately, HollywoodLife reached out to the former Teen Mom OG star and Farrah cleared things up.
"I’m totally not pregnant," Farrah assures.
Let's all just take a moment to take a deep breath and breathe a sigh of relief.
"The message I posted on my Instagram stories," Farrah explains. "Is solely about me focusing on my business right now."
Obviously Farrah's frozen yogurt shop is not an option, since that place abruptly closed.
Farrah says that she's a businesswoman "and putting all my effort into that."
In other words, it sounds like this is a case of Farrah misusing the English language in new, terrible ways.
Which is ... extremely on brand for Farrah.
The former Teen Mom OG star is infamous for her word salad, whether she's speaking or writing.
Some people can become flustered at times or struggle to communicate clearly when writing. Farrah can be incoherent in any medium.
She's a woman of many talents. Sort of.
Recently, Farrah began training in boxing. And she was not shy when asked about whom she would like to fight.
"Maybe some of the Teen Moms who talk trash about me and bully me," Farrah says.
Nothing says I'm totally anti-bullying like I would like to punch people.
"Maybe some of the producers who bullied me off the show I created with them," Farrah adds. "So maybe Morgan Freeman should step out."
To be clear, that is the name of one producer in particular. Not the actor.
"Drita said she wanted a piece of this," Farrah adds of the former Mob Wives star with whom she's been feuding. "But I don’t know if she’s for anti-bullying cause she’s all about bullying."
"I just want to make sure I know what I’m doing and look my best," Farrah concludes. "Like I’m Floyd Mayweather stepping in the ring for the women."
Floyd Mayweather, who is the absolute opposite of an advocate for women, is a really odd person to bring up in this context. Oh, Farrah.
Now, we give Farrah a hard time, but only because she deserves it.
Farrah isn't the worst mom in the world -- or even the worst mom from the Teen Mom franchise (Jenelle!).
But even if we ignore Farrah's recent screwed up dead dog drama, simply the idea of a child learning English from her is enough to keep us awake at night.
Even if Farrah finally gets to bone her clone, we hope that she lets Sophia remain an only child.