Queen Elizabeth II to Meghan Markle: Bish, Your Family Sucks

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By now, you've probably heard the many accounts of Meghan Markle's awful family, and the many ways in which they've attempted to bring her down.

At this point, we think it goes without saying that these are truly sick people.

Meghan Markle Happy

For one thing, there are the obvious sociopathic tendencies that Samantha Markle demonstrates every time she opens her mouth.

On top of that, there's the total lack of any logical throughline in the Markle's actions.

Samantha happily plays the villain one day -- like when she admitted she's just trying to cash in on Meghan's fame -- then attempts to re-cast herself as a victim the next.

Meghan Markle: Bumpin!

Meg's father, Thomas Markle, claims he's been cut out of his daughter's life and has no way of getting in touch with her.

Then, when Meghan writes him a heartfelt letter imploring him to stop bullying her in the press -- he sells it to a British tabloid!

Put simply, these people suck ass.

Meghan and Thomas Markle

And now Queen Elizabeth II has essentially confirmed that fact with the Royal Seal of Suckitude.

Okay, sadly, that's not a real thing, but according to a new report from Vanity Fair, QE2 shares the rest of the world's opinion that we a wall -- except instead of building it at America's southern border we should use it to isolate the Markles from the rest of society.

Obviously, the Queen doesn't publicly sound off on this sort of thing, but the word is out -- she's no big fan of Samantha and Thomas.

The Queen Remembers

Royal expert Katie Nicholl tells VF that Queen Elizabeth “is super concerned” about Samantha and Thomas and the effect they may be having on pregnant Meghan's mental health.

“She cares for her dad, and has concerns for him and his mental health, which is one of the reasons she doesn’t want to comment on this,” a source says of Meghan's recent reticence.

“It’s a very complex, very emotional situation, and let’s not forget she is seven months pregnant.”

Meghan Markle and Her Bump

The Queen's concerns echo recent comments made by George Clooney, who likened Meghan to the late Princess Diana.

“She’s a woman who is seven months pregnant and she has been pursued and vilified and chased in the same way that Diana was and it’s history repeating itself," Clooney remarked.

“We’ve seen how that ends,” Clooney added.

George Clooney at the TCAs

It's times like this we wish the guillotine had never gone out of fashion.

Not that we want Thomas and Samantha to be beheaded, mind you.

It's just that the device itself -- gleaming blade overhead, noggin-collecting basket at its base -- sends a powerful message to those who are of a mind to mess with the Crown.

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