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First, they were friends. Next, enemies. Now, disgustingly thin and spoiled lovers?

Make no mistake, that’s Nicole Richie leaning in to give her former nemesis, Paris Hilton, a lick on the ear. Or perhaps she’s whispering a few sweet nothings:

I haven’t eaten in six years; there’s plenty of room for you … you’re giving my arm a boner … I look nothing like Anna Nicole Smith

Carter Reum, Wife
(Getty Images)

The duo sat in the front row of last week’s Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show, receiving a first-hand view of actual beauty.

We’re not sure when they decided to follow the lead of rival Lindsay Lohan and give their own gender a try, but men around the world are eternally grateful.

Meanwhile, we can only imagine how Paris Hilton’s pussy feels about it. Seriously. We can and we did.