Farrah Abraham has just announced a new erotic romance trilogy. You cannot make this stuff up. Its title? Celebrity Sex Tape. We are dead serious.
The novels are loosely based on Abraham’s own rise to stardom and the recent scandal that put the Teen Mom under intense public scrutiny in 2013.
By "scandal," the publisher means the Farrah Abraham porn movie she signed up to do and tried to pass off as a leaked private sex tape. Just FYI.
Book One: In The Making is due out in July 2014. Cannot. WAIT.
“In The Making reveals the truth about ‘being in the limelight’ as a young celebrity,” Abraham says. “Writing this series was like therapy for me."
"Fallon’s story follows what I’ve gone through recently, much of it witnessed and misunderstood by the public," she adds, seemingly without irony.
"Book One is an entertaining and sexually charged novel, but it’s also an inside look at the underside of being a reality TV star that everyone else can relate to.”
Girl knows a thing or two about the underside, no question about it.
Previously, the Teen Mom star has released a New York Times bestseller, memoir My Teenage Dream Ended, which sold more than 500,000 copies.
More recently, Abraham was a cast member on VH1 Couples Therapy, where she lied about being drugged and raped while promoting her sex tape.
In The Making introduces readers to budding celeb Fallon Opal.
When rumors begin circulating that Fallon has a sex tape, scandal erupts and the world’s top media outlets are on the hunt for a story relentlessly.
Sound familiar? Where did she come up with that plot ...
Millions of people want to know the details, and the whirlwind sweeps Fallon into a struggle between living her own life and delivering what “they” expect.
But Fallon isn’t all she appears to be. Her lonely lifestyle has led to a dirty mind and she aches for a human touch, time and time again. Deep stuff.
Celebrity Sex Tape is being released by Ellora’s Cave, the world’s first and foremost publisher of erotic romance. Will you be picking up a copy?!
Classic Farrah Abraham quotes we hope to see in the books:
[On daughter Sophia] I have my own life and [I'm] doing [my] own thing. She has her own life and she does her own thing.
I think having a TV show that shows your personality and your intimate life, you know, showing your best friend, and then showing having sex ... to me it's kind of the same thing because both things are intimate.
I feel like if I can't show my true self, and if I can't explore who I am, then it would be lying to myself and I would stunt my growth. So if I feel like opening up a restaurant, opening up a gentlemen's club, opening up a children's clothing store, and doing songs, books, everything that I feel like doing, I'm going to do it. It suits me well.
I'm young, I'm 22, and I'm a single mom. On the flip side, I'm a very good mom. I work very hard. I'm probably one of the best parents you're ever gonna meet. That's who I am.
I think moving on in my future and in my career that is something that I am proud of at the same time I'm using it as a positive rather than a negative, which is hard to deal with at times.
I just want to bring great prices and better products to the world and be creative all at the same time, and I think that's what I'm good at business-wise. That's Farrah. If you know me, that's me.
Against all odds of everybody else telling me not to sell it, not to do it or whatever - it was already out, it was already going to be out there for free, so I made a business deal out of it. I'm smart, and I'm happy that I did that.
I am not a porn star, I'm going to be done doing adult gentlemen's clubs and exotica expos soon you know. At first I loved doing that, meeting new fans that appreciated me as being on Teen Mom and having a sex video that was out. Now I feel like it's gotten too far and I just kinda want to be done with that. I think going out and doing some of these things are fun, but when it gets to a point when itâs not fun, it's more distracting, I'm not about that anymore.
I have friends who are in the adult entertainment industry, and that is something that they make their full income off of. That is what they dedicated their life to. And if thatâs your choice that's fine. Personally, making a sex tape, and that's all I've ever done, that's not being a porn star. I live a very different life. I canât help what the public perceives.
) #XXXâ¬I KNOW WHAT'S OUT. Don't talk to me about it! Thanks âª
You're very close with [fans], so in that aspect, in that light, I think it's only helped me be more honest and a hardworking person because I have more going on than my personal life, I have a professional life. So that's how I feel about that.
[On James Deen] I don't need to talk negatively about someone because I have nothing good to say. He should really just get out of the porn industry because things have gotten to his head, he disrespects women, and his penis is small. I haven't seen many but his definitely was not big.
[To Charlie Sheen] You sound like you have mental issues, (hints maybe you need some anger management counseling) given your disgusting lash out towards my body and my relationship with my daughter which each are both the epitome of perfection.
Knowing my sex tape was out there for everyone in the world to see... was overwhelming, I wanted to hide my face and not go out or pick up my phone.
[Also on her DUI arrest] I was drinking throughout the night but I was just getting drinks from friends and I was not really trying to drink.
[On her DUI arrest] I did not endanger anyone's life.
Jenelle [Evans] has all the potential to turn her negatives into a positive like I have.
I'm trying to do something in my own way. I'm staying true to myself.
I really enjoy at this time of my life writing about sex. I think it's because I'm 22, and kind of single. What better to express yourself in a positive way than writing.
They need to look at those parts of their society and maybe just not want to kill each other and get rid of somebody like Hitler.
I say go where the getting is good. I'm not going to find such marriage material at a club. I do dabble with, like, some businessmen that I do meet.