Here's something we believe so strongly that it's practically the unofficial THG motto at this point:
Jenelle Evans is a truly terrible mother.
She's been accused of abuse, neglect, and just about every other kind of horrendous behavior a parent can engage in.
And this isn't idle tabloid speculation either -- many of these actions are documented by court papers or MTV camera crews.
We've known Jenelle is the worst for quite some time -- but even we were shocked by her latest mini-scandal.
Take a look:
Maintaining the Facade
As we said, Jenelle Evans is no one's idea of a perfect mother, but she may have just hit a new rock bottom in terms of face-palm parenting.
Usually, when David and Jenelle hit the road, it's sans offspring, so it was nice to see that they decided to switch things up by bringing their kids along on a trip to Myrtle Beach this weekend.
Not Exactly Family-Friendly
The entire family went to a restaurant called Dick's Last Resort, and if you're anything like us, that name's got you suppressing about 1,000 obscene Jenelle jokes.
The restaurant writes jokes on hats that are then placed on their patrons' heads. The incredibly cringey cap given to Jenelle's stepdaughter Maryssa read, "Future Star on Teen Mom".
Maryssa is 11, so you can see why that one didn't go over particularly well with fans.
Think of the Children
From there, things got -- well, not necessarily worse, but arguably more embarrassing, as 9-year-old Jace was next to be crowned.
We Can't With These Parents
Jace's hat read, "Future 40-Year-Old Virgin," presumably because Jenelle collaborated with the staff to think of an insult that's certain to f--k her son up.
David wore a hat that made reference to his "Inch and a Half of Pleasure," which prompted his daughter to ask for an explanation.
Meanwhile, Jenelle rocked a hat that informed the world she's on her knees "more than Tim Tebow."
We Said, Sarcastically
That one earns a double thumbs down as both an old-ass reference and a joke that Jace is sure to be sharing with his therapist in 10 years.
Always a Sign of True Comedic Genius
As you can see, Jenelle and David simply couldn't get enough of the innuendo-heavy hats. But many of their Twitter followers failed to see the humor.
We're sure the staff didn't relish putting these hats on the heads of little kids.
We Think You Know the Answer to That
We're beginning to understand why Jenelle has never said anything funny in nearly a decade of reality TV stardom. Her sense of humor is ass.
The Thirst Is Real
Sadly, as with every dumb thing they do, Jenelle and David are probably loving the attention. And they're having a banner week in terms of publicity stunts.
First they gave up on their fake separation charade, possibly after fans noticed that David is still living at home and Jenelle is rocking her wedding ring in all her recent photos.
In On the Act?
Shortly thereafter, Jenelle's former fiance, Gary Head, reached out to her with a freakin' tweet.
Here We Go Again
This prompted David to issue a threat in response, thus kicking off another round of ultimately meaningless drama.
Gotta Hand It To 'Em
Say what you will about the Easons, they have a talent for clinging to relevancy.
Of course, this latest stunt might backfire, as David has a rap sheet a mile long, and issuing threats over the internet is a serious offense.
But hey, anything to hold onto the spotlight, right? Someone should remind David he's not being paid for any of this.