Angela Deem Called Out as Hypocrite by Michael on 90 Day Fiance Happily Ever After (Recap)

Angela Deem and Michael Ilesanmi

Having just stormed away from Michael in fury after he did not immediately surrender to her and meet her demands, Angela does what she does every chance that she gets: lights up a cigarette, no matter who is nearby. Genuinely, the production team cannot be getting paid enough for this. At least this time they’re on a balcony and not indoors.

Despite everything, Michael still loves her

Whether this is Stockholm Syndrome, a convincing performance, or something else … we honestly cannot say. But for whatever reason, Michael attempts to comfort his wife. He reassures her that he loves her.

It could have gone better

Angela responds by yelling that she does not, in fact, know that Michael loves her. In her mind, “love” seems to mean total obedience without question or debate. She demanded that he delete his Instagram, he refused, and to her, this defiance is not only a sign that he doesn’t love her — it is all of the evidence that she needs that he must be cheating and “scamming” her. No, she does not explain.

Michael once again tries to explain

Noting that Angela seldom gives him a chance to actually speak during their calls, he explains his social media aspirations. Simply put, he needs to make a real income. As a pain Instagram influencer, he could do that — for himself and for his family. With Angela in some way falling short financially (we’ve all heard the $5k figure, but it’s unclear how much she normally sends), he wanted an income.

Michael notes that this is normal

Not only are there cultural expectations at work, but just about every society on the planet expects a grown and able-to-work 34-year-old man to either have an income or to be so wealthy that he does not need them. Sometimes, there are exceptions, such as stay-at-home fathers, but that is not Michael’s story. Instead, Angela wishes him to remain a kept man until his visa arrives — but she’s apparently not sending him enough money to “keep” him, so to speak. But she has also forbidden him from holding a normal job, because financial independence seems to threaten her insecurities.

A raging Angela insists that this is not about money

Angela strikes out with her foot, kicking the table in a display of fury. “I don’t give a goddamn about no money, bitch” she yells.

“F–k you and your goddamn money, bitch!”

Angela then stands over Michael while screaming obscenities at him. It is, as always, difficult to witness this sort of verbal and emotional abuse. No one deserves to be treated this way. Even if all of Angela’s suspicions about Michael were somehow true, that would still be the case.

Why can’t she trust him?

She yells at him that he is “untrustable,” which may be Angela’s special way of saying “untrustworthy.” He insists that he is not using his Instagram to flirt. In Angela’s eyes, his defiance and his refusal to allow her to pour through his phone for evidence, makes him a liar. To the camera, Angela says that Michael is too boring to make any substantial amount of money on Instagram. Lovely.

Michael has something to say, however

He brings up how Angela was flirting with and duetting a man on TikTok. She and this man, whom we saw earlier this season, were dancing together in public videos. They were even flirtier in private calls. Angela, who sits there smoking in the restaurant, tells Michael that she did all of that to make him jealous and to get his attention. Disaster.

It is time to taunt him

“Your visa is about here,” Angela reveals. She does not share this with the tone of a person conveying good news. She tells Michael that her attorney has advised her to pull the visa since Michael is “hurting” her by having an Instagram. We all saw her conversation with her lawyer earlier this season; we must have missed that piece of advice. Angela insists that he needs to show her that he’ll put her first.

Bilal Hazziez and Shaeeda Sween

Early in the episode, we see a simple explanation of Ramadan. It can be easy for some ofus to forget that not everyone grew up with Muslim friends and classmates or even learned about a plurality of faiths in school, so this is one of those increasingly rare “educational” moments on The Learning Channel for a lot of viewers.

They still make time to tease each other

Apparently, Bilal got the completely wrong product for a meal that Shaeeda is making. Meanwhile, he apparently lectures and corrects her about her diction and her Trinidad dialect.

Producers have a question

After Bilal heads out, a producer asks Shaeeda if she and Bilal have, in the weeks since they last filmed, discussed the timeline for conceiving a child. Originally, the plan was to try to conceive before 37-year-old Shaeeda turns 40. But her gynecologist just ran a series of tests, and recommends that they try to conceive in the next 6 months if they want to have a kid and would like for it to be a natural pregnancy. According to Shaeeda, it is basically a forbidden topic in their home right now. Bilal does not want to talk about it, so he doesn’t.

But Shaeeda has a plan

Her hope is to get Bilal’s mother, Halalah, and his sister, Nefertari, in her corner and helping to encourage him to help her conceive before other measures like IVF might become necessary.

At family dinner

Shaeeda is clearly eager to bring up the topic that Bilal has been dodging. To be clear, she doesn’t open this up as a complaint, just as sharing what she and Bilal have (or have not) been up to. But it’s not exactly subtle, etiher.

Nefertari had a child late in life

In fact, as if their wombs and egg supplies were identical, Bilal suggests that Shaeeda must have six years ahead of her at least. That is not how this works, and the gynecologist made it pretty clear that the ticking clock on Shaeeda’s ovaries is no joke.

After dinner, Shaeeda gets more specific

She reveals that her doctor has advised her that, by the time that she turns 40, her odds of conceiving will only be around 5%.

Halalah worries that this could make or break their marriage

And Shaeeda is clearly picking up on the fact that, though Bilal is not giving a firm “no” about having more kids, he seems to be avoiding the topic entirely. If he keeps this up, it’s just as much of a “no” as if he said it out loud, but it’s also less honest.

Ed Brown and Liz Woods

Driving away from her tearful confrontation with Big Ed at his home — he has oncea gain told her to go stay somewhere else, as he does when he’s mad — Liz has to phone a friend for a place to stay. Not an ideal way to spend the night after your engagement party.

Liz does have one stop to make, first

Liz threw her $13,000 ring into a bush. Well, she went to retrieve it. Honestly, our guess is that a producer stuck around to keep an eye on it, but that is purely speculation.

She found it

But Liz’s quest for the ring was not about rekindling her engagement. She just wants to give the ring back to Ed.

Liz’s friend comes to meet her

Tawny is sympathetic. She is also much, much less tolerant of Big Ed than Liz is. Even now, Liz seems to want to defend some aspects of him, but Tawny isn’t having it. Honestly, it’s a hard thing to watch your friend fall someone who is toxic and has no redeeming qualities whatsoever. And it sounds like this has happened to Liz before. Poor Liz. And frankly, poor Tawny. This can’t be easy.

“In this moment, I would rather be single”

Liz says that, if they break up tonight, then it’s over for good. Finger’s crossed!

Ed shows up to confront Liz

While she is in bed, Ed shows up to once again insist that it was perfectly reasonable for him to suspect that Liz, a straight woman, had engaged in a secret relationship with one of her lesbian friends and then invited that woman to the engagement party. He also gripes about her drinking, as if their home doesn’t look like a liquor store enough for both of them.

But Ed’s conspiracy theories are a mask for real problems

Liz reveals that Ed told her that he wouldn’t just want to sleep with another woman, but specifically named Alex, her model friend, as someone more desirable. That is toxic and cruel. Being drunk is no excuse.

Ed claims that Liz said the same hurtful stuff back

But no, that’s not the truth, Liz counters. She says that her own hurtful comments have been different. Specifically, saying that Ed has a small penis. Great, now we’re all burned with the thought of his dong. Truly this is a wretched day. Anyway, body-shaming is always bad and neither of them should be saying these things to each other, but we can likely all agree that Ed’s statement was worse.

Liz is tired of Ed’s toxic insecurities

And she is tired of the way that he makes his issues into her problems. Finally, Liz is standing up for herself.

Which of course makes Ed angry

He then tells her — absurdly — that with the “right woman,” he doesn’t feel insecure. Let us know when the super-hot 20-something woman who doesn’t make you feel insecure comes along, creep!

Liz makes an important observation

Big Ed claimed repeatedly this season that he has been through therapy and changed his ways. But, as Liz observes, he’s still doing the same things. Weird accusations, kicking her out of the house when things go wrong. He’s even trying to (falsely) “out” Liz as bi, when he accurately outed his ex, Rosemarie Vega, at a Tell All seasons ago. Of course he hasn’t changed.

Jenny Slatten and Sumit SIngh

Now that the Honeymoon is over, Jenny has a lot of unpacking to do. Sumit is planning to meet with his family. He wants things to be “at least” as they were before they learned that he and Jenny married. He invites Jenny to come along, but she would prefer to avoid it.

“What a waste of time”

Privately, Jenny doesn’t think much of Sumit’s hopes that this family will call him once a week or his attempts to reconnect. Why? Because she knows this battle. She’s watching him fight it for years. It’s hard to see him try to cling to the people who hurt him the most. “He’s trying to keep me happy, but he’s trying to convince his parents to be happy for him. It’s starting to get old.”

Sumit think that Jenny only feels this way because she is American

It is sort of interesting to hear outside perspectives. Many of us in the US see a “forgive your family no matter what” cultural norm being widespread and nearly inescapable. People in some other cultures, outside of the US, who live in a more extreme version of that mindset may see Americans as “too quick” somehow to cut out family. As Sumit says, he believes that no one will ever love him like his family does. That’s a little heartbreaking. We have all seen how they treat him.

Sumit meets up with family

He hugs his aunt, Surat. His brother Amit and his sister-in-law Shree are there. But who is missing?

No sign of his parents, Amit and Sahna

They’re not running late, because they’re not coming at all. Sahna disowned Sumit and doesn’t want anything to do with him, and she meant it.

Apparently, Sahna is not doing well

As soon as friends and neighbors found out that Sumit married Jenny, they apparently began to bring it up to Sahna, who seems to not be doing well. Her inability to control her adult son is taking a toll.

But Sumit assures them that he is doing well

As always, he only wishes that his family could be happy for him for marrying the love of his life. They emphatically are not. And his aunt is solidly on his mom’s side on this.

Here it comes …

Apparently, this is yet another storyline of parents who feel that their adult children “owe” them grandchildren. They know that there’s no future for kids with Jenny, and Shree even notes that Jenny would have trouble keeping up with children even if she somehow had them, due to her age.

SAY WHAT??

Sumit vows to his family that he will one day have children. We … do not know what is going through his head right now. Jenny is in her sixties.

That’s an understatement

Sumit comes home and relays most of his experience to his wife, but he does not share everything with Jenny.

Well …

Jenny suggests that they could try out life in America. If Sumit’s family won’t accept the marriage, then they’ve tried everything that they can.

But Sumit doesn’t see that as a fix

And he worries that his family will reject him even further if he moves. Just how disowned does Sumit have to be before he gives up on them?

But Sumit isn’t ready to talk kids

He made the promise, eager to please his family, but “I promise to have kids” is obviously a weird statement to make without consulting your wife.

Jovi Dufren and Yara Zaya

Mrs. Gwen shows up to take Jovi and Yara and Mylah to the airport. She is sad to see them go on this trip to Prague, but they say their goodbyes at the airport. Jovi apparently sleeps the entire plane ride. We know that he’s accustomed to flying, but when you have a small child, you should take turns.

Yara is so happy to be home

Different people have different preferences. While there are likely places that Yara would better enjoy, she has not loved New Orleans. Prague is not the same as going home to Kyiv or any other place in Ukraine, but it’s Europe. And her mom is waiting.

Yara’s mom, Olga, cries when she sees them

It has been two and a half years. And of course their home country is under siege by Russian invaders. Of course this is an emotional reunion.

Yara is not afraid to mention that she misses home

Olga reminds her that Kyiv, as she knew it, no longer exists. Yara disagrees, saying that Kyiv is still there. Yara hopes that she can, in some way, help with the rebuilding. After the brutal invading forces are defeated, of course.

Olga quickly bonds with Mylah

Noting that Mylah clearly recognizes her maternal grandmother from the phone, they all see how responsive she is to her. Jovi and Yara are eager for Olga to babysit Mylah, both so that she can bond and so that they can have some time together as a couple. Yara spoke previously about how she came with cultural assumptions about how a grandmother would provide childcare, and this is what she meant. Jovi suggests that Olga could take a refugee visa and nanny for them, but unfortunately the refugee visa would mean that Olga cannot return to Prague (where she works) or anywhere else for about 10 years. Everyone hopes that Ukraine will be restored long before then.

Speaking in Ukrainian (which Jovi has yet to learn — his mom roasted him in the car for saying that Olga should just learn English if she wants to communicate with him), Yara admits to her mom that she’s torn about her desire to live in Prague for a while versus her desire to return home. She misses her mom and other family, especially during this war. But this is a big decision and will take time.

Jovi meets up with a friend

Talmadge is from Georgia (the state, not the country), but became travel buddies with Jovi for a while. Until Yara, of course. Now, they are touching base and sharing a beer. They discuss logistics, including how many of Yara’s family could conceivably come home with them. Meanwhile, Jovi relates how much Yara dislikes living in Louisiana, and how she bristles at fried food. Agree with her or not, we can all acknowledge that New Orleans is perhaps not the best fit for Yara’s personality. Jovi tells Talmadge that he hopes that traveling like this will show Yara that she’s no longer “stuck” in New Orleans … but he hopes that she doesn’t want to actually move to Europe.

Kimberly Menzies and Usman Umar

Miss Kimberly passionately defends herself against the accusation that her gift, a cow, is intended as a “bribe” to make Usman’s family like her. If it were, it has backfired, but they already disliked her.

Usman speaks up

To his credit, he has repeatedly defended Kimberly and her character against his mother’s suspicions. But it doesn’t make a dent, unfortunately.

They bring up the same old “you must have a child” demand

There is a line between cultural expectations and human rights. We can acknowledge that there is a lot of beauty and strength from the intersection of many distinct cultures while also noting that Usman’s autonomy does not go away simply because of geography. Whether Usman has children is not up to his mother, not morally. Culturally, that is another matter.

A compromise

Usman’s mother says that Usman’s first wife should be a young, fertile Hausa girl there in Nigeria who will give him Hausa children. His second wife — and any after — are totally up to him, apparently.

Usman’s mom is apparently worried about what the neighbors will think

Because Usman is “famous” in their area, people talk. And they don’t like the impression that Usman is giving off by pursuing these American women.

The ultimatum

Kimberly must be the second wife, not the first. This is the total opposite of her own compromise.

On the way home, Usman tries to cheer her up

It’s hard, though, because this meeting wasn’t just about whether this woman likes her. This woman has a lot of power over Usman.

Kimberly hears the bad news

Usman tells her about his mother’s idea of a “compromise.” From her perspective, that’s what it is. To Kimberly, it’s a total dealbreaker.

Especially because Usman won’t stray from it

A lot of rhetoric about “why not date someone here” is rooted in xenophobia, but it is a good idea to know the cultural expectations of someone whom you might date. And whether or not they will go along with or violate those customs. You probably don’t want to develop feelings for someone who will or will not marry you based upon a parent’s opinion. That’s true here in the US, too.

Usman promises to think of something

For now, he suggests, they should rest on it. Tomorrow, they can try to find a workaround.

The next day, they talk

Usman is getting a manicure during the talk, which seemingly does not make it awkward. At least, it’s awkward enough on its own.

Kimberly will never be a second wife

She’s feeling positive, but she doesn’t know a solution. Because becoming a second wife is a non-starter for her. Usman suggests that they just tell his family their plan, but there’s no reason to see that making anything different. Kimberly affirms her love for Usman, but says that if this can’t happen, she’ll leave here single.

This makes Usman angry

He calls Kimberly “disrespectful” for sticking to these boundaries, and claims that he is making way more compromises than she is.

Oh, Usman, this is not a good look

Usman once again begins to rant about how many beautiful women are lusting after him in his DMs. He says that he turned them down because it “shouldn’t” be “about beauty.” Um, what exactly are you saying?

YIKES

Kimberly can read between the lines, that Usman is essentially saying that he chose her over the beautiful women. Indirectly, he is calling her “ugly.” Once again, he is acting like being with her is a sacrifice.

Kimberly angrily walks away.

This is not the first time that Usman has treated her like this or insulted her to her face while boasting about his social media DMs, All that she wanted was for him to tell his family that she will never be his second wife, and this is how he reacts

Usman doesn’t stop there

He says that he will regret a breakup, but that Kimberly will regret it more.

Because he’s just so desirable

We don’t know what’s going on with Usman, but his antics are making it clear that he is not worth the heartache that she is enduring to be with him.