Kailyn Lowry has a new boyfriend.
No, another new one.
It’s a little tough to keep up with her relationships, so it’s OK if you missed the memo on this one.
She’s also been obsessed with Chris Lopez for years now, regardless of her relationship status, so that makes things more confusing as well.
But in April, we learned that she had a brand new love interest!
She dumped Malik and quickly jumped into a relationship with her neighbor, a 23-year-old guy named Elijah.
Elijah moved in with her approximately three seconds into the relationship, and ever since then, Kail hasn’t stopped fawning over him.
She’s said that this guy is the love of her life, that she could see herself marrying him, the whole thing.
At first she wanted this little fling to be private as well, then she decided to do a “soft launch” of their love, which, whatever.
She slowly started posting photos of him or of the two of them together.
But now, at long last, it appears we’ve moved into the hard launch phase of things, and she went and interviewed the kid on one of her podcasts.
And it’s just really, really difficult to listen to them talk to each other.
While talking about how they met, Elijah stated that “I had already bought my house and moved into my house before I knew that this was your house.”
A wordsmith, this one!
Kail, who insists on calling him Lijie or worse, Baby Lijie, asked who pursued who in the beginning, and the poor kid just couldn’t find an answer.
Finally she answered for him — she did the pursuing, to no one’s surprise.
Her co-host suggested that Kail was a “stage five clinger,” a reference to the movie Wedding Crashers, but it seems like Elijah’s too young for that reference because he told her that he’s not aware of these stages.
At another point in the podcast, they talk about the kittens that Kail recently brought into the house.
This is interesting because Elijah said that he was allergic to cats, but she didn’t seem too bothered by that.
Later, they talk about their first fight, which doubles as a poop story — lucky us!
Kail said that he was driving her when she got a “crazy pain” in her stomach, and she recalled telling him “I need you to go 100 mph.”
He told her that he couldn’t do that because he didn’t want to lose his license, which is more than fair, and he also suggested they stop at his mother’s house, which was close to where they were.
“I was mortified,” she complained. “I was like, ‘I am not meeting your mom for the first time and almost sh-tting myself on her floor.'”
She then told him to run a red light so they could get home faster, but he wouldn’t do that either, which upset her greatly.
“I was just about to sh-t myself and you’re being mean to me,” she whined.
After she did her bathroom business, she “was mad because I thought he had an attitude.”
“I was like, ‘I’m not talking to you because you’re mean.’ He came in the room and we talked it out. To me it was a fight, to him it wasn’t.”
How manipulative do you have to be to tell someone that they’re being mean to you because they won’t drive illegally and dangerously?
But these aren’t the only red flags in this relationship!
In other podcast episodes, Kailyn has said that she clips his nails for him and threatens to call his mother if he refuses.
She also tracks his phone so she can keep an eye on where he is when he’s not home with her.
And in this interview, she mentioned that she packs his lunches for him because he doesn’t know how to make his sandwiches correctly.
All of this along with the age difference and how she insists on calling him “Baby Lijie” …
It’s really creepy, right?!
We all know that Kailyn doesn’t have healthy relationships.
She was violent with Javi on Teen Mom 2, and she was arrested for assaulting Chris two years ago.
She’s cheated on partners, and she’s gotten at least one protective order against an ex just to teach him a lesson.
But with all that being said, we’ve never seen her be so motherly with a boyfriend.
And we don’t like it, not one bit.
What do you think about Kail’s new boyfriend?