Ariana Grande On Performing Her New Music: It's Hell!

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After putting out two back to back albums, climbing to number 1 on the Billboard charts, and slaying the stage at Coachella over the weekend -- it's safe to say Ariana Grande is living her best life.

Or is she?

Ariana Grande Belts Out a Hit

Ari got super personal on her last two albums, Sweetener and thank u, next, but she is finding it hard to keep her emotions in check while performing the songs on her tour. 

Which only makes sense considering the songs are either referencing to her ex-fiance Pete Davidson or her late boyfriend Mac Miller

The popstar has always been praised for being open and honest when it comes to her fans and she kept it real once again on Thursday as she opened up about the struggles she faces while performing. 

Ariana Grande on Social Media

On Thursday a fan tweeted, "Music is your therapy and I love seeing it heal you."

And while most followers expected her to reply with a heart emoji or an "i love u" she shocked us all by revealing that's not always the case. 

"Making it is healing," she said in a since-deleted tweet. "Performing it is like reliving it all over again and it is hell."

Mac and Ariana

The Arianators quickly rushed to her side offering their support. 

Many said they "wouldn't be mad" if she canceled the rest of her Sweetener tour to take time for herself."

However, the singer was adamant that she "won't do that." 

Ariana Grande is Pensive

When a fan asked if she thinks touring is good for her health, Ari responded, "I don't think it is." 

"honestly, it's been v hard. i have [so much] on my mind and it's so heavy," the "7 Rings" songstress shared. "but i'm trying hard."

She posted another tweet adding, "i just feel empty and i wanna have more to say/better energy to give to u and rn i don't have anything. love u."

Ariana Grande on The Gram

This confession came after her ground-breaking 2019 Coachella performance -- where she was the youngest headliner at the festival.

More recently, the 25-year-old opened up about her mental health struggles too. 

Taking to her Instagram Stories, she revealed the "terrifying" levels of her PTSD she had after getting a brain scan, as reported by E! 

Ariana Grande and Miley Cyrus on Stage

"Didn't mean to startle anyone with my brain thingy," she wrote a day after sharing her results which could be connected to the deadly terrorist attack that happened at her May 2017 concert in Manchester, England. 

"It just blew me away. I found it informative and interesting and wanted to encourage y'all to make sure you check on your brains / listen to your bodies / take care of yourselves too."

She continued on, saying, "I love Science and seeing the physical reality of what's going on in there is incredible to me."

Ariana Grande: A Picture

"I mean, I feel it all the time, but seeing it is totally different and super cool."

Ari explains that when she is having a good day she feels the need to share that and wants to be more open about her experience with her PTSD. 

"I am constantly working on my health / learning how to process pain (aren't we all). Everyday is different but I'm doing my best."

Ariana Grande, God Is A Woman

She also admits that she thinks she would be more sad if she didn't commit and continue on with her tour. 

"Having a routine is good for PTSD . been readin bout it. i would be sad without the shows too. imma be ok. might change the set list a lil," she shared. 

This is Ari's first time hitting the road since her split from Pete and Mac's sudden death. 

Ariana Grande Instagram

Her tour began in March 2019, which originally consisted of 42-arena shows in major cities around North America. 

But since she is oh-so popular and fans all around the world want to hear Ari's latest jams, she has added nine more performances to her tour. 

This has been a defining year for Grande, no-doubt, and while we wish her the best with her remaining shows, we also hope there's a tropical vacay or some major down-time calling her name here real soon. 

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