Farrah Abraham Remembers Derek Underwood in Heartbreaking Tribute

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Look, Farrah Abraham is awful. She's really, truly just not a great person.

Like, at all.

Farrah Abraham Wax Figure

But under that rough exterior, if you look past her rudeness and her inability to speak to literally anyone with the smallest amount of respect, you'll see that she's kind of a broken person.

Sure, she's still awful, but she's been through stuff, you know?

She's hinted at some major trauma she experienced in her childhood, and we've seen on Teen Mom OG how bad her mother, Debra Danielsen, can be.

And then there's the tragic story of her relationship with Derek Underwood.

Derek was Farrah's high school boyfriend -- and he's also Sophia's father.

They had a pretty dramatic relationship, as you'd expect with a couple of teenagers (one being Farrah Abraham). As she revealed in her book, her parents hated him.

Farrah Abraham, Bending Back

At one point, her father caught them having sex in her bedroom and she claimed that he chased him out of the house with a knife.

Because of all those shenanigans, her parents wouldn't allow her to see him, and so when he passed away in a car accident during her pregnancy, she'd never told him that he was going to be a dad.

If you watched the early seasons of Teen Mom, you know she really struggled with losing Derek.

And if you didn't catch those old episodes, then all you have to do is check out this touching message Farrah wrote to Derek in an Instagram post commemorating the anniversary of his death.

Then you'll see the heartache.

Along with a photo of his headstone, she wrote "In loving remembrance to Derek Underwood, 12/28/2008 father, son, nephew, cousin, friend, and so much more."

Derek Underwood Grave

"December 28th comes every year when we review all of our love, great memories, share stories and know how special Derek was and how all the special and highly favored charisma passed on to Sophia."

(Yes, it doesn't exactly make sense, but she's trying, OK?)

"This past year Sophia was bullied for not having a father at her old public school," she continued. "I thought why would any child not understand that's out of ones control and no one would ask for that."

"In a world full of ignorance and wrong doing I'm happy to say my daughter knows her truth and has strength in that beyond the ignorance."

Farrah also touched on her troubled relationship with MTV, writing "This year I saw an employer long time production and my mother try to use my loss as their gain for heartache and to act as though they cared about my health and supported the struggles of the loss of Derek I go though ..."

Farrah and Sophia Abraham Selfie

"But for years they could not let it be at peace as nothing needs to be relived and this year of review has spoken for those who can not live life peacefully with you and support your growth and are not excited for your future and living better, happier, healthier are no longer welcome."

In a piece of advice for the team behind Teen Mom, she said "Don't ever manipulate or take advantage of a mother or child as they go through loss & challenges it's disgustingly evil."

She also wrote "Thank you Daddy Derek for always watching over us and this year we're at peace and happy with the loving support of family who live by this and we're in loving spirits on our Hong Kong trip as Derek would love the heights & the water of Hong Kong island as he did of his rock queries."

She closed her message "with love" from "Farrah & Sophia for those who want peace, life, love, happiness and a new chapter."

Again, a lot of this doesn't really make much sense at all.

But it's obvious that Farrah really feels some deep, complicated feelings about what happened with Derek, and losing a boyfriend like that at such a young age must have been devastating.

Losing a boyfriend at such a young age while pregnant with his child?

It's no wonder the girl's got some issues.

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Farrah Abraham Quotes

[On her DUI arrest] I did not endanger anyone's life.

Jenelle [Evans] has all the potential to turn her negatives into a positive like I have.