Danielle Bregoli. Her bad behavior and distinctive threats earned her fame as the cash me ousside girl. More recently, she's been making music under the name Bhad Bhabie. Sure.
That's not exactly the kind of branding that you associate with ivy league education. And yet ... Danielle recently bragged on social media about receiving a full ride to Harvard.
Please tell us that this is just a bad dream. Please.
Danielle Bregoli took to Instagram to share this image.
Whether the image is real or photoshopped (though the Florida native who new resides in L.A. has been spending time in New England, recently), Bregoli's caption sure raised some eyebrows:
"Keeping da t-shirt , but giving away my full ride scholarship to Harvard to da best fan video of #igotit"
She followed this with three emojis of tearful laughter.
Then she wrote:
"@harvard #futuredropout" followed by a bag of money emoji, a black heart emoji, and a fire emoji.
What. On. Earth.
Ignoring the ludicrous tag and a definitely not real giveaway ... did Danielle Bregoli somehow get into Harvard?
If we learned one thing from Gossip Girl, it's that Blair Waldorf is beautiful and amazing and deserves the world. But we also learned that ivy league universities have an interest in attracting students with famous names.
(Okay, we didn't need Gossip Girl to learn that)
Is Danielle Bregoli ... or Bhad Bhabie as she is calling herself now in what we assume is a (successful) effort to destroy any lingering faith in the world ... quite famous enough to make the cut?
First, she appeared on Dr. Phil for her bad behavior, where, taking offense at the audience's laughter, she attempted to threaten them with "cash me ousside, howbow dah?"
What some saw as the atrocious behavior of a girl with an unenviable life and very likely no real future, others saw as an accidental moment of comedic genius. A meme was born.
Not all memes lead to personal fame, but this one did, and Danielle is capitalizing on it. She's moved to L.A. where she reportedly has a reality series in the works.
And that's not all. ...
Danielle Bregoli is making music. As we mentioned, under the name Bhad Bhabie.
And it is with a heavy heart that we report that Danielle Bregoli's first single was record-breaking.
So she's an upcoming reality star and, like or not, the fourteen-year-old troublemaker is a success in the music industry.
Bhad Bhabie is set to make millions from her music deal, because the American Dream is dead and we're now living in the American Nightmare.
With all of this considered, has Harvard offered her a very early admission ... and a free ride?
Like, we don't know for sure in terms of Harvard releasing a statement on the absurd subject.
But the common sense that we keep in our brains for just such occasions tells us that Danielle Bregoli is just saying outlandish things for publicity.
That is literally how she got famous, folks. She has a brand to maintain.
It's not impossible for a 14-year-old to get into Harvard, but if insulting Dr. Phil were all that it took, any 14-year-old who's ever seen that poorly-disguised Texan walrus would have gotten an ivy league education.
By the way, the fact that Danielle was offering her full ride as a "giveaway" is probably supposed to be her nod that, you know, she's joking.
That's not how full rides or scholarships work. it's not a cruise.
We do have to wonder if Danielle Bregoli might end up getting sued over that post. Some might consider it false advertising. If you announce a giveaway prize and can't deliver, well, a jury might decide that you have to fork over some serious dough.
If somebody takes her at her word and decides to sue, we might end up cashing her in debt.