Monday on The Bachelorette, Kaitlyn Bristowe culled the herd of aspiring husbands as we move closer to the inevitable Nick Viall-Shawn Booth showdown.
NOTE: The Bachelorette spoilers now tell a very different story about how that showdown ends than we originally believed ... but that's another story.
As for how things played out on last night's episode? Read on ...
Perhaps the most insane thing is that there are three more weeks to go until the end of this roller coaster season. We don't know if we can take it.
Nick and Shawn weren't the final two yet, but they might as well be, making us half-wish that Kaitlyn revealed The Bachelorette winner on the spot.
How much more crying and complaining can we take, honestly.
Anyway, Joe was invited on a three-on-one with Shawn and Nick, where viewers at home were briefly reminded that Joe is still on The Bachelorete.
He told Kaitlyn he's in love with her. She sent him home. Bai.
As for Jared, he didn't even get to see Kaitlyn for days before being booted during the rose ceremony. The non-contenders are dropping like flies.
Ben did get a real date with Kaitlyn, and it went well.
He expressed his desire to talk all night on an overnight date, to get to know Kaitlyn better. He may not know Kaitlyn all that well based on that idea.
Just saying. Not shaming whatsoever, just saying.
Backtracking a bit to the three-on-one, after Joe's exit, Kaitlyn told Nick she would see him at the rose ceremony and said she had to talk to Shawn.
Mr. Booth was downright giddy about this prospect, but clearly had no idea the real reason why she wanted to sit down and speak to him privately.
They were gonna talk about her boning Nick.
In the end, Shawn handled the news okay. Not great, just okay. But not truly horribly either. After composing herself, he agreed to get past this.
"I don't want to make this about him. At the end of the day, I'm here for you and you're the only thing I want out of this," he said, and moved on.
Or did he though!? [Cue dramatic pause]
At the rose ceremony, Shawn was the first to be offered a rose, but first said he had to talk to Kaitlyn again ... and talked himself off the ledge, again.
He got the rose. But is really acting like kind of a douche. No one's saying he has to like Nick, or that Kaitlyn likes other guys, but it is what it is.
The entire premise of the show is she dates multiple men. Acting so insecure and borderline slut shaming Kaitlyn just makes you look pathetic.
STFU and be a man, bruh. Real talk.
As for Nick, on his subsequent date with Kait, he confessed his own dislike for Shawn, and how he was "Eskimo brothers" with some country star.
Totally something to brag about, Shawn.
The next morning, in the Fantasy Suite, we saw Nick and Kaitlyn enjoying breakfast until Shawn booth was suddenly calling the hotel's front desk.
He found out what room Nick Viall was staying in, and knocked on Nick's door, and the two sat down to talk before the obligatory "to be continued."
Three more weeks. Seriously.