Well, it’s over. We all thought these two lovebirds had a real chance to make it in this topsy-turvy world, but after 18 months of dating, Leonardo DiCaprio and Toni Garrn have called it quits.
Or, more accurately, Toni came home one day to find all her crap on the lawn with Tobey Maguire standing behind it doing his best menacing glare.
Okay, we may have made that part up, but even though details on the split are scarce, we think it’s safe to assume that Leo was the one who put an end to the whole thing.
OK! reports that the first sign of trouble for Leo’s flavor of the month came when he opted to stay home and party as she attended New York Fashion Week alone.
That’s probably for the best. Given DiCaprio’s current size, he would’ve stood out at Fashion Week like, well…like a fat guy in a room full of runway models.
Of course, we’re just assuming that Leo is the one dumped Toni. Maybe that’s not the case.
Perhaps she saw the video of DiCaprio rapping and realized she can’t be with a man who combines the girth of Notorious B.I.G. with the talent of Vanilla Ice.
Or maybe there’s some truth to the rumors that Leo can’t last in bed, and Toni realized that she’s not gonna be a 22-year-old Victoria’s Secret model forever.
In any event, it looks as though it’s really over. It’s already sad stuff, but we imagine the worst part for Toni will come 14 years from now when Leo marries a civil rights lawyer out of the blue.