Spencer Pratt may want to crawl back into the hole we assume he's been living in for the past six years or so.
The former reality star and celebrity gossip magnate is back in the news this week due to an interview he just gave to Vice's Broadly.
Pratt tells the publication about life as a cast member on MTV's The Hills, which catapulted him and girlfriend-turned-wife Heidi Montag into random sensations for multiple years back in the early 2000s.
"We were fame whores, getting literally a million plus a year in photos and being hated for it," Pratt says to Broadly. "It's frustrating for me that people don't recognize that this was genius.
"This was innovating!"
He's not totally mistaken.
Unlike Kim Kardashian, Pratt did not need to make a sex tape in order to become rich and famous without having any talent.
(Although Montag did spread a rumor about frenemy Lauren Conrad having a sex tape and it led to a lot of drama and... really... you should go watch The Hills. It was great.)
According to the interview, Pratty spent $3,000 per day on his hair and makeup budget, while also enjoying the occasional $30,000 shopping sprees.
Pratt estimates he was making "upwards of a million dollars a year" from MTV, paparazzi deals and hosting gigs.
"Sh-t, we knew how good the Jersey Shore was because we were super fans," Pratt told the outlet.
"So I personally was like, 'I need to be nutso at this point, like holding crystals to my head.'"
Indeed, according to Spencer and Heidi, they once spent $70,000 on a crystal to add to their growing collection.
After six seasons, however, MTV ran out of storylines to concoct for the series and pulled the plug.
Needless to say, it was tough on Pratt.
"[The Hills getting cancelled] was our 9/11," Pratt said, comparing the moment to America's most devastating terrorist attack in what have been a mistaken, slight exaggeration.
But we won't make too much fun of Pratt for saying such an insensitive thing.
Why kick the guy when he's down?
Spencer says, after all, that he and Montag are now worth $10. Total.