The Hills star Heidi Montag sought perfection when she underwent 10 plastic surgery procedures in one day late last year. Safe to say that didn't work out.
"Parts of my body definitely look worse than they did presurgery," she tells Life & Style in the tabloid's new cover story. "This is not what I signed up for."
That's just too bad... except that it's EXACTLY WHAT SHE SIGNED UP FOR. You don't go for a routine physical and stumble into this by accident, idiot.
Look what they did to me! Feel sorry for me!
Only Heidi Montag would try to have a plastic surgeon make her into a human Barbie doll, then decide that might have been going a little overboard, then try to play the victim and milk it for even more publicity and money later.
Makes it difficult to feel very sympathetic, we'll be honest.
In the magazine, she details her plastic surgery disaster:Unsightly scars. Red inflammation. Uneven body parts. Lumpy legs. Jagged marks. Botched liposuction. For Heidi, this decision has left indelible marks.
"The big dark mark from my chin reduction is probably the most noticeable. The absolute worst is on my breasts, and the scariest is below my butt cheeks," Heidi says. "People have fewer scars from car accidents than I have on my body."
The only difference? No one gets into car accidents on purpose.
At least she admits, to her credit, that she really blew it:
"I would love to not be 'plastic girl' or whatever they call me. Surgery ruined my career and my personal life and just brought a lot of negativity into my world. I wish I could jump into a time machine and take it all back," the 'Tag laments.
"Instead, I'm always going to feel like Edward Scissorhands."
Don't be so dramatic, Heids ... the career was already over.