We hope you are sitting down, dear readers.
We hope you are not operating any heavy machinery right now.
We hope you did not just take a drink of any beverage because, if you did so, you will likely spit it out all over your computer screen upon reading the following statement:
Jenelle Evans may be pregnant with her fourth child.
G-d help us all.
This is what some fans believe after seeing a photo of Jenelle and violent husband David Eason at a wedding a few days ago.
Is the rumor true?
It's at least strong enough to have prompted a response from Jenelle herself.
Scroll down for the latest update on Jenelle's womb...
Jenelle Has Three Kids
Only two are actually under her supervision, but they are: 10-year old Jace, who lives with his grandmother; four-year old Ensley; and two-year old Kaiser.
There's Also Maryssa
She's 11 years old and she's Eason's daughter from a previous relationship and she lives with the couple.
The Kids are Cute
This photo makes the family almost look functional, too. HOWEVER...
... We All Know the Truth
Which is that Jenelle and David lost custody of these kids for about two months after Eason murdered the family dog and authorities deemed their household a dangerous environment in which to raise kids.
Fast Forward to This Week...
... and the frightening possibility that Jenelle and David may become parents again.
What Prompted Such Scary Chatter?
The photo you are staring at right now. Many Instagram followers looked at it and believed they saw a baby bump.
Is It True?!?
The rumor grew powerful enough that it reached Evans and she responded to all the questions and comments.
This is What She Said:
"Not pregnant, just fat."
So much for that possibility, huh? Probably a good thing.
Also: For Shame, People!
You'll almost never see us defend Jenelle in any form, but it really is rude to speculate about a woman being pregnant. It's way too personal of a topic for strangers to talk about based on some random social media photo.
It's rare for Evans to garner public support, but this subject prompted one follower to write: "You’re not fat, FFS, you’re a beautiful woman who has given birth to 3 beautiful babies. Embrace yourself and the critics and haters can debrief with their plastic surgeons. You look happy and healthy and that’s so important."
"To all those saying not so nice stuff," another person wrote. "Didn't you ever hear, 'If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all?' Watch Bambi y'all! Ps. [Jenelle Evans] you and the kids look so happy. And you're absolutely not fat."
Jenelle has actually said she is very unlikely to ever have children again.
The former reality star revealed in April, after undergoing tubal ligation surgery and having one of her ovaries removed after suffering a number of reproductive issues, that it was now almost impossible.
A Few More Details:
“I decided to get this procedure because I had a really bad problem of irregular bleeding, which lead to ultrasounds then lead to my OBGYN suggesting exploration surgery and tubes being tied,” she told Us Weekly at the time. “She told me my IUD made my lining very thin, which isn’t good.”
“I would have never known about any of this unless I had this procedure done,” she added. “In the long run, it was the best decision for my health and gave me a lot of answers to many problems I was experiencing.”
In Conclusion, Part 2?
Let's be honest: the world is better off if Jenelle and David never procreate again.