Believe it or not, it’s been three months since Jenelle Evans was fired from Teen Mom 2.
For many fans, the reality that Evans is no longer a part of the show will only dawn on them when a new season premieres with Jade Cline in her place.
But it seems that for Jenelle, the truth of her sad situation is already hitting home.
The bad news is, she still appears to have several revenue streams available to her.
The good news is, they’re drying up rapidly.
Take a look:
Sponsored Content
Jenelle has hawked just about every type of product imaginable on her Instagram page. And she’s grown increasingly desperate since getting fired.
Clickbait
Evans’ most lucrative hustle these days is posting clickbait tabloid articles about her former castmates.
Mouths to Feed
We guess it’s not entirely Jenelle’s fault. After all, she has kids to raise and an unemployed husband. What’s she supposed to do, get a real job? Make David go to work?!
Editor’s Note:
(Before you go roasting us in the comments section, please note that we’re being sarcastic. Jenelle and David should both get real jobs ASAP.)
The Clock Is Ticking
Yes, the stakes are high, and the window of opportunity is narrow. Sure, right now Jenelle has a big enough social media following that she can rake in the bucks from sponsored posts — but that might not be the case for long.
Irons In the Fire
To her credit, Evans seems to realize this, which is why she and David are launching businesses like it’s going out of style these days.
Makeup Mogul?
Evans’ long-gestating makeup line, JE Cosmetics, is set to finally launch in September.
Inauspicious Start
Of course, this is a business with Jenelle’s name on it, so it makes sense that’s it a total disaster. Earlier this week, Evans deleted the IG post announcing the launch of her company.
Big Whoops
Also, when you click the link to buy Jenelle’s makeup, you’re taken to a site that was bought out from under her by an animal rights group in honor of Nugget, the dog that she allowed David to murder with a shotgun.
Improvising
So yeah, JE Cosmetics is sure to be a bust, if it’s not dead in the water already. Fortunately, Jenelle has several other hustles going for her.
Cameo By Jenelle
For example, if you want a personalized video shout-out from Jenelle, you can purchase one from the Cameo app. And it’ll only run you … $300?!?!?
Chicken Scratch
Probably not many people eager to take her up on that offer, but as Jenelle revealed in a recent IG Q&A, she’s hoping to make some money from the massive flock of chickens that currently live on her land.
Cock of the Walk
It’s anyone’s guess what she’s planning to do with the peacocks she’s currently raising.
Good Luck With That
Bear in mind this woman couldn’t keep a dog alive, and peacocks are just a smidge more exotic.
Always Time for a Feud
Jenelle is all about promoting her business ventures these days, but she always has time to beef with one of her former castmates. To her credit, that’s her best chance at remaining relevant.
Enter Bad Man
And then there’s David, who’s also trying and failing to make a killing as a business man.
Our Bad
Sorry, poor choice of words, considering the Easons are in this position because of David’s decision to shoot and kill the family dog.
Really, Bro?
Anyway, David’s baby is a brand he calls Black River Forge. As far as we can tell he sells little crafty trinkets that you could probably make yourself in about five minutes.
Yeah, No
As you can tell, potential customers aren’t exactly blown away by David’s craftsmanship.
Inclement Leather
Eason’s latest item for sale is this knife sheath, which he apparently stitched himself.
Not Happening
The vast majority of the comments on his pics are roasting him for the shoddy stitching.
You Set Yourself Up For This One
Of course, some folks skipped right to dragging him for the fact that he’s sewing, which is pretty funny, considering how insecure he seems to be with his masculinity.
Copyright Issues
Also, it seems David stole the name Black River Forge from another company, which is why his social media pages keep getting taken down. So get your digs in while you can, folks.