Ever since Bristol Palin quit Teen Mom OG there have been nonstop rumors regarding her possible replacement.
The show still has four main cast members, so producers don’t really need to hire a replacement at all.
But TMOG has also been struggling in the ratings department for quite some time, and it’s widely agreed that execs will likely seize this opportunity to revive interest by tapping a known drama magnet like Farrah Abraham.
Yes, Farrah was fired from the show way back in 2017, but her name has been bandied about as the number one option to replace Bristol.
Now, Abraham is addressing those rumors for the first time, and fans might be surprised by what she has to say:
Addressing the Masses
Clad in a shirt that reads, “MORE CEOS, LESS INSTA HOES” (classy), Farrah made a video through a service called Postd and, well … posted it to her Instagram page.
A Different Strategy
After over a year of hating on the show and even going so far as to sue MTV for wrongful termination, Farrah is now praising Teen Mom OG.
Um … Where Is This Coming From?
“I was reached out to by E! this week because I guess someone has left Teen Mom OG, the show that I started — 16 and Pregnant — way back when,” says the new ultra-positive Farrah, adding of the show, “We all LOVE it!”
Paid By Postd
“So, I wanted to just respond from all the E! News and everybody else, and put it here on postd.io for you,” Ms. Abraham continued.
Definitely Probably
“I am definitely not ever probably coming back to Teen Mom,” Farrah says. “I have so moved on, and I think it was such a great way to move on.”
Well, This Unexpected
From there, Farrah goes on to claim that she was NOT fired from the show, despite 18 months of evidence to the contrary, including that wrongful termination suit.
Does She Know What “Conspiracy” Means?
“Between all the lies and the conspiracies, and every other thing that happened when I left Teen Mom — I definitely wasn’t fired,” she says.
Oh, This Is Good
“I’ve never been fired,” she continues. “I think some of the producers have an ego, and, you know, I’m thankful to the crew that doesn’t sell out their talent, that takes care of them and that love them.”
Doing It For Sophia
“But, there’s far and few and that doesn’t really exist, and as a mom — a single mom — I wanted to raise my daughter around some more ethical people,” Farrah blathers on nonsensically. “So, better ethical people.”
Reminder
We’d like to take this opportunity to remind you that ultra-ethical Farrah was fired because she refused to stop working as a cam girl for a porn company. Just sayin’.
The Bristol Issue
Finally getting around to the topic of Bristol quitting the show, Farrah has this to say:
She’s Pro Quitting
“So, me and my thoughts on someone leaving my position. I have to say I think that’s best,” Farrah says of Bristol.
Serious Mumbo-Jumbo
“If you guys are, you know, you guys enjoying my “Ambition Into Reality” Master Class, you ladies and gentlemen know if you can’t find your balance and be mindful of what’s going on in your life and you have to leave something, I totally respect that and I understand that. I think that’s what happened in this case,” Abraham continues.
Dreaming Big
From there, Farrah reveals that she has bigger goals in mind than returning to Teen Mom 2 — she wants her own show.
Airport Love
“I love you guys, because every time I’m in an airport, wherever I am, you all are so amazing,” says Farrah.
The Delusion Is Strong With This One
“And you guys who love watching my Instagrams, my YouTube channel — and I know you guys all want me to have my own show,” she continues.
Aw, Shucks
“But, I’m really creating and waiting for the right time for that, and maybe it’s not yet,” Farrah says, crushing dreams all over the globe.
Always Hustling
As far as we can tell, Farrah’s video was less about updating fans on her lack of a TV show and more about promoting Postd, which is apparently a YouTube-like service that charges viewers to watch videos. Sounds like a winner.
You Almost Have to Admire the Shamelessness
Speaking of things no one will ever pay for, it’s not too late to sign up for Farrah’s Master Class, in which she teaches you to run a business.
Bleak Future
These days, it seems that Farrah is still afloat thanks to her role on MTV’s Ex on the Beach, but that was likely a one-season gig.
The Master Is In
That may sound like a joke, but believe it or not, people are actually paying money to take a business course taught by Farrah.
FroCo You Didn’t
Hilariously, it looks to have been shot mostly at FroCo a frozen yogurt establishment owned by Farrah that has since gone out of business.
Empire Falls
And that’s just one of several businesses Farrah has shuddered in the past year. Her two clothing stores — including a children’s boutique managed by her 10-year-old daughter — have also gone out of business.
It All Makes Sense…
The more we learn about Farrah’s financial situation, the more it makes sense that she was unwilling to give up her lucrative side hustle as a cam girl.
The Art of the Steal
But don’t worry, folks who have already shelled out for her Master Class, Farrah can steal teach you a thing or two about entrepreneurship.
Learn By Doing
Lesson One: Don’t waste money on things like internet videos that should be free or classes taught by Farrah Abraham!