Farrah Abraham ... she's just such a special soul, isn't she?
Rarely do we ever see a person so delusional, so misguided, so completely incapable of saying words.
Over the years, she's been getting worse, too, to the point where she's starting to get herself in trouble.
Remember when she was arrested for assaulting an employee at a hotel last month?
As if the incident itself wasn't bad enough for her, she's now facing some consequences for what she (allegedly!) did.
And those consequences are actually pretty intense.
This is Farrah. You know Farrah! She is an absolute mess.
You Can't Do That, Farrah
She's such a mess that last month, she was arrested at a hotel in Beverly Hills after hitting a security guard.
According to police and several witnesses, Farrah seemed to be intoxicated and she'd been arguing with other guests at the hotel. Things were bad enough that the security guard came to kick her out, and that's when she started getting violent.
She also said things like "you should know who I am," and she even told the responding police officers "go f-ck yourselves," which is just too embarrassing to handle.
Great Parenting, As Usual
While she was being arrested, her daughter, Sophia, was fast asleep in their hotel room. So that's cute.
She spent that night and the next morning in jail before getting bailed out that afternoon, and when she was released, she was quick to tell everyone that she was "targeted" and that she didn't do anything wrong. Because of course she didn't.
But as the days went on, her story changed again, and since then she's been saying that she wasn't arrested at all. Yep, even though police came and took her to jail, she wasn't arrested. She didn't assault anyone, she didn't do anything wrong, and everyone is bullying her with this.
For real, that's what she's been saying. It's insane.
But the thing is that even though she likes to pretend otherwise, Farrah lives in the real world. And in the real world, several police officers and hotel staff and various witnesses saw what happened, and they all have the same story.
And in that story, Farrah broke the law. What happens when you break the law?
JAIL HAPPENS, FARRAH. JAIL HAPPENS.
Justice moves slowly sometimes, but at long last Farrah has officially been charged with one count of battery and one count of resisting arrest. But the best part?
If she's convicted, she could spend up to 18 months in jail. 18 MONTHS. Could you imagine?!
She'll be arraigned next month -- August 13th, if you want to put it on your calendar -- so be sure to pray or send some vibes or positive energy, anything and everything to get Farrah in jail.
We Deserve This, Babe
Not because we're trying to be cruel or because we're wishing the worst for Farrah, just because literally nothing else has helped her get any sense, so maybe a year and a half behind bars will do the trick.
Oh, Come On
She certainly doesn't have any now -- even though her charges were announced by the LA Country District Attorney's Office, she said in a statement "That's false."
"Legally I'm not guilty and I'm charged with nothing," she added. "Stop the lies!"
Interestingly enough, her rep didn't back her story, instead telling Radar Online "She has a lawyer. She has a legal team. It's going to be fought!"
You Can't Make This Stuff Up
What's going to be fought though, if she hasn't been charged with anything? What's the legal team all about?
Yeah, obviously Farrah is fibbing about what's going on here. Which just goes to show how delusional she is -- literally everyone else has the same story, that she's been charged, but she actually thinks we'll believe her. Over LITERALLY EVERYONE ELSE.
You know the best part about this whole thing, the very, very best part?
Come Through, Universe
Even though celebrities rarely end up actually going to jail for whatever crimes they commit, there's a decent chance that our girl here will beat the odds and do some real time.
Lock Her Up
Think about it: it's not like there's any confusion about what happened. Aside from the assault, which was definitely bad enough, she told multiple police officers to f-ck off. That can't end well for her.
Her Own Worst Enemy
And honestly, can you imagine Farrah saying one single word in front of a judge and that judge having any other reaction besides "OH MY GOD SHUT UP GUILTY GUILTY TAKE HER AWAY"? Because we can't.
Farrah has never been likable or sympathetic, and that's just the truth. So when you take just her general personality, throw in her alleged crimes, and add on the fact that so many people witnessed them? We might be saying bye to this girl for a good long while.