On this season of 90 Day Fiance: The Other Way, Kenny and Armando are weighing major choices.
The most high stakes choice for their marriage and their family is whether to have a baby together.
Armando would love to give Hannah a younger sibling. Kenneth worries about having a baby at 60.
It turns out that they both have overlapping trauma that informs their decisions. They have both experienced child loss.
Since they first introduced themselves, years ago, on 90 Day Fiance: The Other Way, we knew that Kenneth Niedermeier and Armando Rubio met online.
They didn’t meet on a dating app. Instead, it was a support group for gay fathers.
Kenneth’s four children are all grown adults. And Armando’s daughter, adorable Hannah, is growing up before our very eyes.
During Season 5, they have both expressed their desires for the future.
Kenneth wants to move to Mexico City. Armando is fearful about safety and change.
Meanwhile, Armando wants to have another child together. At 60, Kenny is leery of the idea of being an 80-year-old with a child in college.
But in this sneak peek (below) of the upcoming episode, Armando and Kenneth both open up about a point of sadness that informs their choices.
Kenneth tells the camera about how he and Armando first began to speak in a support group for gay fathers.
What he also details is that they had both lost kids. In Kenneth’s case, it was a miscarriage. For Armando, it was more complex than that.
Kenny was expecting twins. They were four months along when he lost them to a miscarriage.
(He might have been a father of six!)
He spoke to the camera about how that loss impacted him on an emotional level. It’s not just a disappointment; you grieve what might have been.
Meanwhile, for Armando, the trauma cut much deeper.
He was expecting a child — Hannah’s would-be younger sibling. When he lost that baby, it wasn’t just a miscarriage.
That was when his ex, Hannah’s mother, drove aggressively after him and tried to run him off of the road. He lived, but she died. This nightmare situation changed Armando’s life forever.
“Throughout the years I’ve spent time wondering who and what this child would have been, how the child would have interacted with me, with Hannah, the moments we would have had together,” a tearful Armando admits.
“We were ready for her birth. We had a name picked out,” he shares.
Armando adds: “It was very hard to lose her and there’s no way of explaining the pain and the feelings.”
“You know, you already start to love those children from the moment they’re conceived,” Kenneth explains to the camera.
“So the thought of having another child could help heal those wounds,” he admits.
“And,” Kenny continues, “kind of fulfill something that never took place before.”
We can only imagine how deep this pain cuts for both husbands.
They share a similar pain, but that doesn’t mean that they both agree upon a way to move forward.
We trust that this fan favorite couple can work out what will work best for their beautiful family.