We probably don’t need to tell you that being a billionaire has its advantages.
For example, when us peasants have an issue with a social media platform, we just quietly complain and then continue using it, because scrolling through the app gives our tech-addled monkey brains a little shot of dopamine.
But if Elon Musk has a complaint about the way his favorite platform is being operated, then he can just buy it and make whatever changes he wants!
Yes, as you’ve likely heard by now, Musk wants to purchase Twitter and take it private, and even though other shareholders have been resistant to the Tesla founder’s takeover, it looks like it’s gonna happen.
The New York Times and other outlets have confirmed that Musk is nearing a deal to buy the platform for $43 billion.
The company’s board is scheduled to meet later today, and they will reportedly recommend that shareholders take the deal.
This is a personal venture for the world’s wealthiest man, and his other companies — Tesla, SpaceX, and the Boring Company — are not involved in the deal.
There’s been a great deal of speculation about the changes that might be made if Musk completes his takeover of the bird app.
The 50-year-old entrepreneur has said that he plans to eliminate trolling, which is somewhat ironic, as he’s gained a reputation as one of the site’s more thin-skinned bullies (see evidence below).
Speaking of folks who can dish it out but definitely cannot take it, there have been rumors that one of Musk’s first actions as Twitter CEO might be to welcome Donald Trump back to the site.
Trump was banned from Twitter following the January 6 riots at the Capitol Building.
He was kicked off of Facebook shortly thereafter, leading the former president to unsuccessfully attempt to launch his own social media platform.
While Musk has been critical of Trump in the past, he’s obviously sympathetic to the plight of guys who everyone in the room wishes would STFU, and he regards himself as a champion of free speech.
So it’s likely that the Musk takeover will mean the return of Trump, who’s sure to come out guns blazing after a year and a half of spewing batsh-t stream of consciousness rants at Melania.
As for the other changes that you can expect to see if and when this deal is approved, insiders say Musk wants to lower the subscription rate of the Twitter Blue premium service, as well as make the site more friendly to cryptocurrency transactions, especially those involving his beloved Dogecoin.
In his most recent offer letter, Musk was critical of Twitter’s current leadership, arguing that the board is incapable of getting the company’s stock to his offer price.
"The company will neither thrive nor serve this societal imperative in its current form," Musk wrote.
We’ll continue to bring you updates on his developing story, but if the deal goes through today, as anticipated, then we’re sure you’ll be aware of it within minutes.
After all, this is the same Elon Musk who launched a car into orbit for the fun of it.
The guy’s not exactly subtle.