There was a time, not all that long ago, when fans wondered how long Jersey Shore Family Vacation would be able to drag on.
Dubbed "Jersey Bore" by viewers who missed the drama of the show’s heyday, Shore had evolved into a sort of semi-scripted sitcom, entertaining enough in small doses, but was a pale imitation of the ratings juggernaut that became a household name in the 2010s.
But thus far, the fourth season of JSFV has succeeded where its predecessors failed.
In other words, if you’re a fan of the old, messy Jersey Shore, this is the season for you.
Things got off to a rocky start when Ronnie Magro quit the show (only a temporay basis, unfortunately) after he was arrested for assaulting fiancee Saffire Matos.
(Matos later dropped the charges and refused to testify in court.)
Shortly thereafter, the Staten Island Hamster took center stage, as it looked like she would finally file for divorce from Chris Larangeira.
Now, however, Angeliners and Chris are stronger than ever, having been united in their contempt for a common enemy — Vinny Guadagnino.
Yes, Chris should think it’s weird AF that his wife is still so obsessed with Vinny, but instead, he continues to feed into it.
And on this week’s episode of Shore, Larangeira defended his wife after she made up a lie that Vinny got a woman pregnant.
To make matters worse, she then blamed Chris for starting the rumor!
Needless to say, Vinny was not happy about having to deny these allegations, and he made his feelings abundantly clear.
"Angelina and Chris lost me as a friend for making up lies about me and to make it even worse, I have to be with Angelina on my last night in L.A.," Guadagnino said on Thursday’s episode when confronted with the prospect of dinner with Jenni, Denna … and Angelina.
"I didn’t say it. You’re shooting the messenger right now?" Angelina protested when Vin raised the issue with her.
Amazingly, her defense consisted of nothing other than the claim that it was Chris who started the rumor, not her.
"Yeah, I am shooting the messenger. Because the messenger is the only thing here," said an increasingly frustrated Guadagnino.
"Without you, there is no rumor!"
Vinny informed Deena and Jenni that this would not be an instance in which Pivarnick could pull her usual "oh, we talked about it, now it’s done," routine, noting that he would not be able to "just smile and shake it off."
For some reason (read, "because she’s addicted to drama and obsessed with Vinny"), Angelina then called Chris to get his take on the situation.
"He’s a f—ing p-ssy. Put him on the phone. Little skinny little p-ssy runt," Larangeira screamed.
"I wish I was there to f—ing smack him. He wants to talk about me, from now on, don’t talk about me or my wife anymore!"
Jenni pointed out that Angelina was "stirring the pot" by calling Chris, and of course, Pivarnick had no response to this.
"If you guys spread little rumors, you’re not considered a friend to me. It’s a snaky thing to do," Vinny told the group at dinner.
"Chris is pissed at me for being pissed at Angelina. Why are you mad at me?" he asked.
"You guys started it. It’s f—ed up and the more I talk about this, the more miserable I’m going to be."
The man makes a valid point.
But hey, this ridiculous incident wasn’t a total waste of time.
After all, it made for good television, and it showed us exactly why Chris has remained with Angelina for so long:
When push comes to shove, he’s just as petty and psychotic as she is!