No matter where you fall on the political spectrum, you probably don’t need us to tell you that Donald Trump is not the sort of president we’re accustomed to seeing in this country.
While previous leaders of the free world seemed primarily focused on leading the free world (booooring!) Trump has set his sights on continually raising the bar in terms of batsh-t insanity and further debasing America on the global stage.
And today, the Donald struck a major blow against both human decency and dignity of his office when he celebrated his legal victory over his former mistress Stormy Daniels.
On Monday, a judge threw out Daniels’ million dollar defamation lawsuit against Trump, and naturally, he felt the need to take a victory lap on Twitter.
Trump began by quoting a Fox News headline:
“Federal Judge throws out Stormy Danials [sic] lawsuit versus Trump. Trump is entitled to full legal fees,’” he tweeted.
From there, Trump tossed in his own two cents, and man, did things get bonkers in a hurry:
"Great, now I can go after Horseface and her 3rd rate lawyer in the Great State of Texas," Trump wrote.
"She will confirm the letter she signed! She knows nothing about me, a total con!"
Yes, the President of the United States is now referring to his former mistress as Horseface.
Never one to shy away from Donnie’s trash talk, Daniels immediately went on the offensive.
And we’re pretty sure her name should now be listed alongside Lee Harvey Oswald and John Wilkes Booth, because she just killed a president:
"Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present your president," Stormy tweeted.
"In addition to his…umm…shortcomings, he has demonstrated his incompetence, hatred of women and lack of self-control on Twitter AGAIN! And perhaps a penchant for bestiality. Game on, Tiny."
Daniels has talked about Trump’s penis before in the sort of graphic detail that will haunt our dreams for the rest of our days, but flat-out calling the dude "Tiny" in a public forum is an undeniable death blow.
Stormy went on to attack Trump on a subject that’s even more sensitive than his penis size.
We’re talking, of course, about his grammar:
"I see someone finally made it to chapter 3," Daniels tweeted, referring to her recent memoir.
"Also, can someone please teach Tiny about correct punctuation? We already knew you’re a con, though. #triggeredhim #slowreader #commasarehard"
Yes, it seems Trump decided to celebrate his self-proclaimed victory over Daniels a bit prematurely.
Based on this latest exchange, it seems the adult film star and her attack dog lawyer won’t be going away anytime soon.