We can hand Hillary Clinton the Presidential election now!
Because she destroyed Donald Trump at the first debate? Because a video surfaced of Trump saying he likes to grab the pussy of any woman he chooses?
No. Well… yes. Yes for all of those reasons.
But we can mostly hand the Presidential election to Hillary Clinton now because Madonna opened for Amy Schumer at Madison Square Garden last night.
And before turning the stage over to the beloved comedian, the legendary singer made a promise to the crowd.
She specifically made a promise to every man in the crowd (or not in the crowd, we presume) who casts his vote on November 8 for Clinton.
Simply put, Madonna said she will go down on you. She didn’t sugarcoat this. She didn’t beat around any bushes or imply this.
She very straightforwardly came out and said the following:
“One more thing before I introduce this genius of comedy: If you vote for Hillary Clinton, I will give you a blow job,” Madonna said prior to bringing out Schumer.
Wait… what? For real?
Will she put any effort into it to make it worthwhile?
Of course! This is Madonna! She takes her sex acts very seriously!
"I’m good. I’m good," she assured attendees. "I’m not a douche and I’m not a tool. I take my time, I have a lot of eye contact."
Oh, and one more thing, the 58-year-old said:
“I do swallow.”
Check out the video posted above to hear these words come out of Madonna’s mouth… just in case you needed one more reason to do the right thing, fellas.
Schumer, of course, is a huge Hillary Clinton supporter herself.
She got into some trouble last weekend during a show in Florida when she asked a Trump voter to come up on stage and explain himself.
Soon after this man sat down, Schumer laid into Trump (hard!), earning a negative reaction from the crowd that included many people actually walking out of the venue.
Watch the awkward incident take place below:
But Schumer used this as an opportunity to just be hilarious and biting, reading an open letter to these Tampa fans during last night’s performance.
"Dearest Tampa, I’m sorry you didn’t want me, a comedian who talks about what she believes in, to mention the biggest thing going on in our country right now," Schumer said on stage, adding:
"How could I think it was OK to spend five minutes having a peaceful conversation with someone with different views?
"After the show, I want you to know that I will go straight to a rehab facility that will teach me how to make all people happy.
"Both the rich, entitled, white people who are gonna vote for him and the very poor people – who’ve been tricked into it!
"And Tampa, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said that he was an orange, sexual-assaulting, fake-college-starting monster. Shouldn’t have said that.
"I will never again say that he is an orange, sexual-assaulting, fake-college-starting monster!"
But anyway, back to Madonna real quick: we’re voting for Hillary Clinton.