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Jenelle Evans … what a hot damn mess, y’all.

She jumps from man to man, or from douchebag to douchebag, to be more specific, and then tries to convince the world that she’s found her soulmate. And that, as you surely know, is only one of her many, many problems.

Jenelle Evans: Baby Bumpin!
Photo via Getty

Her latest fella — fella? Victim? Partner in (actual) crime? It’s hard to say. — is David Eason, this great ol’ big guy who once said the sentence "I’m about to fill this whole street with uppercut" and who apparently has a rap sheet to rival Jenelle’s, which is no easy feat.

But unfortunately, we heard that Jenelle and David might be facing a rough patch.

David reportedly hopped on Facebook recently to change his relationship status to "it’s complicated," a move so dumb that he might as well have just broken up with her.

According to Jenelle though, "everything’s fine." Sure, girl.

She claims that David "has no idea how it happened," because clicking a few times on Facebook is beyond his understanding, it seems.

Eason’s best explanation is that "he must have accidentally clicked it" when looking at the date of their anniversary.

It’s so sad because, even after all these years, it’s like she still thinks we’ll believe anything she says.

Like we’ll just look at this ridiculous little statement and be like "yeah, that makes sense."

Jenelle and David PDA
Photo via Instagram

If you take a gander at Facebook for a moment, you’ll see that his claim makes little to no sense.

In order to change your relationship status, you have to click on a little drop-down list, and that’s pretty distinct from the relationship date.

He couldn’t have "accidentally clicked it," because he’d have to have accidentally clicked it at least twice.

And the tried and true "it was an accident" excuse might hold a little more water if he’d clicked on something else, you know?

Like if he updated his relationship status to "widowed," then LOL, what a silly mistake, that’s obviously not true!

Jenelle Evans David Eason Halloween 2015
Photo via Instagram/Jenelle Evans

But "it’s complicated" is primarily a relationship status for immature, drama-seeking kids — it fits too perfectly for Jenelle and David, you see.

So yeah, we don’t believe Jenelle, and probably no one else does, either, so David posted this big long post on that pesky, meddling Facebook to quiet the breakup rumors.

"One year ago today," he wrote, "I had one special date with the most beautiful and amazing woman I had ever met in my life."

Yeah, settle in, it only gets sillier.

"There were definitely some sparks flying that night, sparks so bright you could mistake them for fireworks," he gushed.

"Those sparks still fly when we are together and they are lighting our path to our future so nothing can stand in our way!"

David continued, even though we wish so desperately that he wouldn’t have:

"Our actual 1 year anniversary is tomorrow and that year has gone by so fast but that’s just because it has the best year I’ve ever had in my life all because I fell in love with you Jenelle!"

In closing, David wrote "Thank you for always being so perfect! I love you sooooo much babe, forever and always!"

Jenelle Evans Pregnancy Confirmation
Photo via Instagram

Now, we don’t want to imply that Jenelle wrote that and posted it on David’s Facebook to try to put an end to all those rumors, but that really sounds like something Jenelle would write, doesn’t it?

Like, sure, David might be the kind of guy to add four extra O’s in the word "so," but it seems a little fishy, to be honest.

Really, this is just poor timing on Jenelle’s part. It might be fun to see all this drama unfold if it weren’t for the fact that Jenelle’s all set to give birth to David’s kid in a few months.

Jenelle Evans' Boyfriend David Eason

Relationship issues, stupid excuses, and overwrought Facebook posts just aren’t as funny when there are children involved.

Thanks for ruining this, Jenelle. Again.