With so much recent press coverage devoted to what a walking, veiny dong Donald Trump is, not enough attention has been paid to a candidate who’s just behind him – in more ways than one.
Independent ticket hopeful Deez Nuts declared his intent to run for president just last week, and he’s already creating a hairy situation for his opponents.
While Chris Christie discusses his fondness for pulling out as unsuspecting New Hampshire residents push their grits to the side, Nuts is apparently here to stay, and he’s planting the seeds of hope in an increasingly jaded electorate.
If all of this sounds like a joke – well, it is – but Nuts really did file with the Federal Election Commission in an unspecified district, and a recent poll shows that a full 8% of Americans would vote for Nuts over Trump or Hillary Clinton.
Needless to say, those candidates just got hit where it hurts.
Thus far, there’s no word on how the Tea Party feels about Nuts, but we get the feeling he’ll be bagging up campaign contributions in no time.
Sadly, Nuts will not be included in Thursday’s Republican primary debate, but something tells us he’s not sweating.
Of course, with a candidate like Mr. Nuts, the selection of a running mate will prove vital to the future of his campaign.