We never thought we'd say this, but: thank goodness for Martha Stewart!
The ex-convict of a homemaker shockingly owned the Justin Bieber Roast last month, and now she's here to help answer one of the world's most vexing questions:
WHY IS KIM KARDASHIAN FAMOUS?
The reality star has 29 million followers on Instagram and 31 million followers on Twitter. She's beloved by countless of people even though her daily life is a spoiled snooze.
But Time Magazine has named Kardashian one of its Most Influential People alive, selecting Stewart to write a message explaining why in its latest issue.
"Beautiful in an exotic, totally exaggerated way, Kim exudes energy, sexuality, drama, determination, impetuousness and happiness," Stewart writes.
"But she and her famous, entrepreneurial siblings... have also expanded the very definition of family."
Stewart goes on to say there aren’t many “barriers to further explosive success” for Kim Kardashian, adding:
Despite the flamboyance, the self-aggrandizement and the self-promotion (Kim set out to break the Internet by baring her bum in an extraordinary photograph), Kim comes across as an enviable big sister in a clan where everyone seems to love one another.
Are they indeed today’s Brady Bunch?
It's possible. Keeping Up with the Kardashians, after all, is just as scripted as that classic sitcom.