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For all the talk of True Tori (and Tori Spelling’s whole life) being scripted, there were plenty of undeniably real moments last night, for better or worse.

While she absolutely milks her personal problems for money and fame, there’s simply no faking some of the specifics we saw on True Tori Season 2 Episode 3.

It was the kind of slow-moving TV train wreck that just kept getting more ridiculous, and more uncomfortable to watch, with each passing moment.

You couldn’t script anything that bad if you tried. And we’re sure she would.

But perhaps therein lies the genius of the show. She’s trying SO hard to make dramatic, must-see TV that even the byproduct of her failure is pretty epic.

For example, if you can bring yourself to watch True Tori online, you’ll see:

  • Tori argue with Dean McDermott over a baked potato, then turn it into a referendum on how he treats her as a person, in the span of 10 seconds.
  • Tori vent about about those men with cameras … to a cameraman.
  • Tori relentlessly hype up a long-awaited, very much unnecessary reunion with ex-husband Charlie Shanian, only to have him refuse to be filmed.
  • Tori’s kid ask if mom and dad can take turns driving her to cheer.

The young one is clearly a pro’s pro when it comes to reading cue cards.

Watch True Tori Season 2 Episode 3 Online
Watch True Tori Season 2 Episode 3 Online

How can the painful paid possibly top this come next week on Lifetime?

We have no idea honestly, but when it comes to Tori Spelling’s ability to give herself nervous breakdowns for the sake of ratings, we put nothing past her.

Seriously. If no drama presents itself, she’ll come up with some.