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Sorry, fellas, but this is a fully-clothed side.

In the August issue of House & Garden, Pamela Anderson just wants to talk about her life as a soccer mom.

Dylan Jagger Lee, Pamela Anderson, Brandon Thomas Lee
Photo via Getty Images

“I go to every game!” the actress said.

Anderson has two sons, Brandon, 10, and Dylan, 8, with her ex-husband, Rock Star: Tommy Lee. We’re not sure which is more embarassing for these children: their parents’ filmed sex romp; or their mother’s constant, annoying campaign against innocent fur-wearer such as Beyonce.

The magazine describes Anderson’s home as “hippie-chick-meets-Miss Havisham” and shows Anderson in a beach-ready white oxford shirt and shorts. That’s almost a normal outfit. How boring.

“I’m obsessed with living on the beach,” says the Canada native. “I love being outdoors, and think a tan is very sexy. I’ll lie out on white towels strewn with pillows. I don’t like to hide under hats!”

There’s the Pamela we know and love! Bare your … hair.