Jersey Shore Recap: A Leopard Never Sheds its Stripes
This week on the Jersey Shore, the "family" continued to experience all kinds of ups and downs. Vinny fell for a lesbian, Pauly acquired a new stalker, JWoww fought with Roger, Snooki acted ridiculously and no one could figure Mike out.
Pretty standard stuff, really. We are happy/sad to report that no one threw down!
How did it all play out in Seaside Heights? Let's recap Jersey Shore, THG style!
The Situation gets the dirt from his brother on his recent date with Deena's sister. Yep, that happened. As if this crew weren't incestuous enough. Minus 12.
"The real Mike is back and I love watching all the $h!t he does." - Pauly, after Mike decides he's going all out to start some $h!t again. Game on, brah. Plus 5.
Mike's plan to CRUSH Snooki by having his boy The Unit tell Jionni all about Sitch and Snook's sexy times failed because Unit was in Miami. Too bad? Plus 11.
Snooki tries to hang out with The Situation. Always a dangerous move. Minus 3.
Vinny juggles two girls at the bar. Good to be back, right? Plus 11.
Deena keeps Vinny's other girl occupied. Wing-meatball! Plus 8.
The more "hotass" of the two is Nicki, who is a lesbian. Vinny tried to get it in anyway, and Plus 7 for the effort, but Minus 14 for delusions. She bounced.
JWoww ducks out early, hella annoyed that Roger was dodging her calls even though he was down the street on the boardwalk. We smell drama. Minus 9.
Snooki-JWoww Spinoff: Bound For Jersey City!
After Hoboken passed, Jersey City, New Jersey's second largest city, is rolling out the reality TV welcome mat for Snooki and JWoww of Jersey Shore fame.
Jersey City is just a few miles south of Hoboken and across the Hudson River from New York City, so it's essentially the same locale for the classy gals.
Permits were issued for filming a Jersey Shore spinoff starring Snooki and JWoww. Filming is expected to begin this month in the Grove Street Path area.
Nearby Hoboken last week denied the permit, citing safety and quality of life concerns for residents of the city. Its neighbor turned out to be more receptive.
Jersey City Mayor Jerramiah Healy says he believes the show is an opportunity to promote the city, and can be pulled off without adverse effects on taxpayers.
City spokeswoman Jennifer Morrill says the cast and crew must obey all laws and that producers must foot the bill for police to reduce impact on the public.
Fellow cast member Pauly D's spinoff, The Pauly D Project, is set to premiere March 29. As far we we know, the Snooki-JWoww project remains untitled.
Snooki: Bisexual!
This should come as no surprise to Jersey Shore fans.
After seeing Snooki and Deena make out and flash straight vagine in Italy, there was little doubt that the former plays for both teams - at least part-time.
She's now classifying herself as bisexual.
Asked directly by the Huffington Post whether or not she's bisexual, she replied: "Yes, I would consider myself bi. I've done stuff with girls before."
Snooki gives it to Deena doggy/bunny style on Jersey Shore.
Snooki, who's hooked up with more than half of her housemates (male and female), says she wouldn't actually date a woman. Most likely.
"I would never be with a girl because I like... penis. But I've experimented."
We know, trust us. She looks way too comfortable going to town on Deena with that costume on lately. One can only guess what happens off-camera.
Do you consider Snooki bisexual? Or just trashy?
Jersey Shore Recap: Snooki's Urinary Tract Infection, Mike's Tween Angst
This week, the Jersey Shore gang was intact again - "Vinny's home, bitches!" - but the joy of being a family again quickly gave way to a new set of problems.
Both mental and physical.
Snooki legit peed herself (and worse), while Mike began acting very un-Mike-like and even level-headed JWoww experienced some drama with her BF Roger.
How did it play out after the team got Vinny back and returned to throw it town in Seaside Heights? Come along as we recap Jersey Shore, THG style!
Vinny unpacks after returning to the shore house. Good to be back! Plus 7.
Snooki was so excited she "legit" peed herself on the dance floor and rushed off into the restroom to grab some body spray for her kooka area (above). Minus 70.
Deena gets quasi-electrocuted trying to fix her hair extensions. Plus 9.
The following day, Snooki made sure to put on two pairs of underwear in case she had another "accident." In the daytime. Snooki is officially a toddler. Plus 14.
Snooki Pregnant, According to Report
Jersey Shore star Snooki Polizzi is pregnant, according to Star magazine. We'll believe it when we see it, but that's what they're saying in their latest issue.
The reality star and boyfriend Jionni LaValle are expecting, an "insider" says, spilling: “She is pregnant and has only told closest friends and some family.”
Never one to keep quiet, the 24-year-old can’t resist hinting that something's up: “She’s been telling people that she has a big announcement coming.”
... Possibly a great deal for the poor kid.
Snooki (a.k.a. Nicole Polizzi) will soon be starring in a Jersey Shore spinoff with JWoww ... if they can find a place to film after Hoboken kicked them out.
Wherever it films, Star claims Snooki/Jionni Jr. will be part of the plot.
“They are having to redo the creative direction of her Jersey Shore spinoff because of Snooki's pregnancy,” says the alleged insider of the guidette.
Despite Snooki's weight loss in recent months, the reality star has been dropping clues on social networking sites that she may be in the family way.
“I feel sick,” Snook admitted in a January 25 post on her Facebook page, then later tweeted: “Late night craving... yogurt hits the fricken spot!”
That doesn't really prove much. Much like her craving to get it in, Snooki's odd food cravings can take place at any time and involve any thing.
Then again, that could also explain the pregnancy. Congrats, maybe!
UPDATE: Snooki's rep tells E! News that there is no truth to the rumors and that the MTV star is not pregnant. Snooki herself denied the rumor later.
"I'm not [pregnant]. Does that mean they're calling me fat?" she asked on Opie and Anthony in the morning. "That means that I have a belly, then."
Hoboken, N.J. to Snooki & JWoww: You're Outta Here!
Snooki and JWoww need a new place to set up a smush room shop.
The classy gals' new Jersey Shore spinoff just hit a snag after Hoboken, New Jersey's film commission voted (unanimously) to deny permits to film in the city.
The Mayor of Hoboken, Dawn Zimmer, said the decision was made by officials "based on protecting public safety and quality of life concerns for Hoboken residents."
According to the mayor, there's a list of problems with a 24-hour permit in Hoboken, such as a policy that prohibits ALL filming after 11 p.m. in residential areas.
Explaining the decision, the mayor says that filming would result in an "unacceptable lessening of the quality of life for the local residents and businesses."
No, not due to pickle shortages.
Traffic, noisy crowds, and completely disrupting day-to-day life would likely be real problems, though, so the city decided to give the Jersey Shore stars the axe.
Of course, Snooki and JWoww, plus all their crew, can also stimulate a local economy, so the good could outweigh the bad ... is booting them really smart?
Eh, most likely.
[Photo: WENN.com]
Jersey Shore Recap: Gym, Tan, Get Vinny Back!
This week, the Jersey Shore house was in turmoil with possibly two men down. Could they turn it around by the end of the night and restore order to Seaside?!
It's been two episodes since Vinny Guadagnino peaced out, and it looked like The Situation - saddened by his lack of popularity - was about ready to follow suit.
He seemed to have a change of heart, though, after some joint birthday attention with Pauly. The question is whether the gang would also be Vinning again.
How did it play out? Come along as we recap Jersey Shore, THG style!
Mike was never really leaving, despite last week's birthday blues. He was sad, yes, but it was his own fault and even he knew it, and can you see Sitch turning down attention and sitting at home? Vinny, yes. Mike, no. Plus 6.
He's also sensitive deep down. Cancer, obvi. Plus 4.
"This is my family," insists Snooki. True, girl. Plus 2.
Shore Store boss / house owner Danny pretended to be upset about them not putting in effort at work and threatened to bring in some replacements. Right. Minus 10.
He says "the deal" was eight people under his roof and working for him, so, time to put up a fake Help Wanted sign. Can we just drop the pretense of work? Minus 17.
Jersey Shore thrives on authenticity - Team Meatball may be repulsive, but it is the real deal - so why stir up fake Shore Store drama? Oh yeah, to fill time. Plus 3.
Jersey Shore Sneak Peek: Party Store Tiiiiiime
Snooki and Deena hit up a local party supply store on an all-new Jersey Shore this evening. The results are about what you would expect from Team Meatball.
When the vertically and intellectually challenged duo ventures out to buy supplies to throw a shindig for the guys, all hell breaks loose in the local party store.
Donning giant rabbit heads, the two decide to go at it like that particular species, which is pretty much what goes on most night's at Ocean Terrance in Seaside.
Seriously. Sometimes Deena and Snooki make out with each other.
Jersey Shore Recap: Birthday & Meatball Day Blues
You knew there would be some drama this week on Jersey Shore.
After all, Vinny Guadagnino peaced out of the house and half the crew didn't even know yet, so the reality of their "soul" returning to Staten Island was yet to sink in.
There were also two birthdays and two fools celebrating Meatball Day, which should really become some sort of holiday from now on, at least at The Hollywood Gossip.
How did it all play out? Come along as we recap Jersey Shore, THG style!
Deena breaks down when she hears about Vinny. "He was like, my soul," she says. Really? Your soul? Do you even know what that is? We love Vin but Minus 7.
"I'm going to smash this tattoo chick in my man Vinny's bed tonight, in honor of him leaving the house." - Pauly D with one of the best Jersey Shore quotes to date. Plus 30.
"It is what it is, I'm used to it," says a mature Jenni, who HAS to be the one that implodes at some point, right? She's been way too stable of late. Still, Plus 15.
The Situation speaks Italian with Pauly D's girl. Impressive? Sleazy? Eh, Wash.
Vinny returns home to his family. His mom greets him not with joy and warmth, but by telling him to go to bed. Wasn't expecting the cameras, probably. Plus 5.
Isn't that why he came back, too? To be told what to do by his mom? Minus 5.
"Meatball Day" ends badly for Deena and Snooki. Plus 20, because with those two, it can't possibly end "well" in the conventional sense. They go hard. Respect.
Deena rips out her hair extensions. You mean she's not all-natural?! Minus 10.
Snooki Without Makeup: Holy ...
Wow. Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi from Jersey Shore actually looks semi-normal when you strip away the fake eyelashes and several gallons of lipstick and bronzer.
Seriously, she's demonstrably average looking!
The 24-year-old drunken maniac / reality star tweeted this all-natural photo of herself earlier today, with the caption "no make up today, and IDC [I Don't Care]."
Doesn't she look surprisingly decent? And probably 10 pounds lighter when you take off all that crap? You tell us. Check out these Snooki pics and vote on her best look!
