All good things must come to an end. So, too, must the first season of Jersey Shore, and The Hollywood Gossip has all the action recapped below as only we can.
Last night's ninth and final episode of the MTV hit's inaugural run was somewhat subdued and sentimental (seriously), which wasn't a bad thing. Let's get to it:
Pauly D's girl says the gang is "acting like Israelis." Vinny's reply: "Israelis are like [machine gun noises, gestures]." Equal opportunity stereotypes! Minus 3.
Vinny, Pauly D, and Mike head out for some male bonding. Plus 4, because this surprisingly normal behavior makes them actually look like chill dudes. Almost.
Sammi bails Ronnie out of jail after his latest fight. They hug. He says he's not sorry he hit the guy, only that he got caught, blah, blah, we're bored. Minus 5.
Upset over guys, Snooki decides to dance away the pain. Solo. In broad daylight. People stare as if this were the first Oompa Loompa in a white, leopard print mini dress they've ever seen break it down in front of a camera crew. Plus 6.
One-woman dance party. Snooki stizzyle.
Pauly D: "We stayed boys throughout this whole thing. This bond that we shared brings us together and no one can ever take that away from us, ever. Like, we take that with us for life, this bond ... That was deep." It sure was. Plus 4.
Sammi and Ronnie go out on a date, "somewhere out of Seaside ... getting away from it all." In Belmar, an even trashier location 17 miles up the coast. Minus 3.
The pair toasts each other and their future, post-Shore. Actually kinda sweet. Plus 2.
Poor Snooki whines about guys some more. Geez, give it a rest, girlfriend, Minus 7.
We learned last night that Vinny thinks Pauly D is "ridiculously, ridiculously good looking." Pauly D's look to the camera said it all. He's the ultimate guido! Plus 9.
Snooki and The Situation go hot-tubbing. We're scared for what's coming. Minus 5.
The Situation and Snooki suck face. We're as grossed out as you.
Revolting as watching Snooki maul The Situation might seem, he was actually being genuinely nice to her, before, during after making out. Plus 6 for his sensitive side.
Mike: "Next thing you know, Snooks' clothes just started coming off!" No no no no no. Fortunately, he puts a stop to it, because they're like siblings, so only Minus 3.
Cue season-ending montage:. Fights. Hook-ups. Pickles. Abs. Fights. Hair spray. Fist-pumping. Fights. Hot tub action. Arrests. Laughs. Fights. The Situation. Plus 5.
TOTAL: +10! SEASON: +56! We're ready for a break from the Shore, but we also can't want for it to return. Follow the link for a full season of Jersey Shore quotes!