Tabloid Hilariously Reports: Brad Pitt Moves Out, Brangelina Relationship is an Act
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have a Little League team worth of kids at home.
They give to numerous charities.
And nary a named witness has said a word about any fights between the couple.
Yet, according to a supermarket tabloid, the pair cutely dubbed "Brangelina" has broken up. Pitt has even moved out, as this reliable publication screams on its cover:
Beware, Robert Pattinson: There's a good chance this tabloid will next claim Brad Pitt is making a move on Kristen Stewart!
Despite appearances - as well as all sanity and logic - to the contrary, life for Hollywood's hottest couple has never been worse, sources told In Touch Weekly.
“Sure, they look happy in photos,” a friend said. “ [But] the cracks in their relationship are getting deeper and deeper. They are actors and can turn it on for the cameras most of the time.
Hmmm, they are actors! Each has even been nominated for an Academy Award! This story is seeming more likely by the second.
Following an argument in April, an insider said Pitt stormed out of the couple's rented mansion in Long Island, New York: "He told her very clearly that he just can’t live with her anymore."
In response, Jolie has allegedly offered Pitt $90 million for custody of their kids. If we were Brad, we'd totally hold out for $91 million.
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December 2nd, 2010 11:26 AM
I agree love them together,hope all their humanitarian are genuine,
November 9th, 2009 9:32 AM
go back to jen you idiot!!you two belong together
November 1st, 2009 12:00 PM
Who cares about Angelina. She is too old and skinny. You would think she makes enough money to buy a hamburger and eat it. I believe she manipulates the press to suit her needs.
Rank: D-Lister
October 9th, 2009 12:30 AM
they say anything about these two no one in hollywood can be just a happy couple in the tabloids
Rank: D-Lister
October 9th, 2009 12:29 AM
tabloids and their made up stories
October 6th, 2009 5:30 PM
There is no way that this is true......
October 5th, 2009 12:59 PM
this is sad :(
dont make fun of rob!! i love him and wouldnt really care if someone took kristen off him ;)
September 30th, 2009 12:20 AM
I agree with pak31! The tabloids should be ashamed of themselves with printing lies I just wish Ange and Brad would sue the tabloids for DEFAMATION this would wake up the lot of them, such crap printed!!!!!!
September 29th, 2009 8:40 AM
The tabloids have had them breaking up for a very very long time now, yet they are still together. Anyone who believes this garbage just because it's in print needs a reality check. I understand the concept of a tabloid, to get people's attention, but if these stories are lies, they shouldn't be able to print it.