We're not being sexist or short-sighted, we're simply relaying the opinion of Maxim and British tabloid, The Sun. Each publication feels very strongly about the breasts of this beauty.
The former recently interviewed this English model, as she tries to step out of the shadow of the often-nude Keeley Hazell and make a name for herselfâ€¦
You've got best breasts in the UK. Are you tempted to get them insured?
People keep asking me this, but how the hell do you get your boobs insured? I thought it was just a joke, but apparently Mariah Carey's got her legs insured for some stupid amount of money, so maybe it can be done. What would happen?
Especially since yours are the best in the countryâ€¦
Well, yeah! I don't know whose I'd have. Maybe that means I think mine are best! Michelle Marsh has got good boobs, and Lucy Pinder. They're obviously bigger boobs, but they're good.
* The Hollywood Gossip note: You can see Lucy Pinder and Michelle Marsh posing topless with their large breasts in Nuts magazine.
What's the stupidest thing you've ever dressed up as?
Actually, I'd never been to a fancy dress party until the other week. I just went as me! I didn't get dressed up, but it was supposed to be a caveman/cavegirl theme. Jodie Marsh was there, and for some reason she was wearing a knicker-and-bra set with a big top hat and a veil. I just thought, â€˜What a strange outfit.' She was uglier in real life than in pictures. Not that I'm being bitchy!
What's your favorite part of your body?
My boobs! Do you need to ask? I'm actually quite self-conscious, but I'm confident about my boobs. People always ask me if they're fake, and that really pisses me off.
Got that, people? Sam Cooke is no Heidi Montag! Her enormous breasts are real and she probably hates Spencer Pratt as much as the rest of us do.