Cisco Adler

Cisco Adler is off the market. Ladies, it's Christmas. Get over it.

The musician and ex-boyfriend of Mischa Barton and Kim Stewart proposed to his model girlfriend, Barbara Stoyanoff, about a month ago.

As everyone knows, Halloween brings out the crazies.

It also brings out the attention-starved douchebags. Two cases in point: Cisco Adler and Perez Hilton.

Police in Fargo, N.D., arrested Cisco Adler, best known for that picture of him naked except for tube socks, and for his romantic relationships with various celebrities, on Thursday morning after he punched a bar employee in the nose.

The incident took place during a brawl after his band's show at The Hub.

Alleged rocker and former Mischa Barton boy toy Cisco Adler was denied entry to or kicked out of Teddy's at the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel Sunday.

Perhaps he was too drunk, Teddy's has a dress code he didn't conform to, or the bouncers feared seeing Cisco Adler naked after 12 rum and cokes.

No one is accusing Democratic presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton of anything resembling the lack of personal hygiene exhibited by "rocker" Cisco Adler.

Her political tactics, however, are growing dirtier by the day.

Lisa D'Amato is a former finalist on America's Next Top Model.

Cisco Adler is an alleged rocker / long-haired dude who dates famous girls and sometimes shows off giant balls in pics found in Paris Hilton's locker.

Las Vegas was saturated with tipsy celebrities celebrating the anniversary of the popular Tao nightclub over the weekend, reports the New York Post.

Leading the way? Cisco Adler and Lydia Hearst, his new girlfriend. The pair was spotted cuddling in the VIP room, while Lydia Hearst's ex-beau, actor Justin Bartha, "looked on" from a table nearby. Ah, that scandalous Cisco Adler.

We have never understood the appeal of this gentleman, but there's little doubt that model / heiress Lydia Hearst is all over Cisco Adler's junk in this photo.

We mean that in the figurative sense, of course. Although the guy has some seriously huge balls. Oh, don't act like you don't know already this from the infamous Cisco Adler nude pic that was circulating around a while back. You know you love it. 

Ah, young love. Who needs flowers when you can just get matching tattoos you're going to want to have laser-removed in four months anyway?

Publishing heiress-model Lydia Hearst and her sometime boyfriend, the, um, incomparable Cisco Adler, are now sporting identical ink on their wrists.

Cisco Adler is more than just a dude who plays in a band and has giant balls. He's a dude who plays in a band, has giant balls and dates rich girls.

His new high-profile gal: model and publishing heiress Lydia Hearst-Shaw.

Here's a piece of celebrity gossip that has left us shocked and appalled.

Perez Hilton reports that The Hills star, Lauren Conrad, was seen making out with a random dude in Vegas this past weekend before the VMAs. Which would be cool, as she currently "dates like a guy" and has every right to play the field.

Cisco Adler wants you to ignore that naked photo.

And his ex-girlfriend.

It's been months since we saw Cisco Adler naked, but those giant testicles are seared into our mind even more so than the last Britney Spears crotch shot.

It's sad, really.

If you thought the sight of Cisco Adler naked was disgusting, imagine swapping spit with the man himself.

Reportedly, Paris Hilton no longer has to envision this scenario: she lived it last night at Guy's karaoke.

The Hollywood Gossip tells it like it is.

As a celebrity gossip provider, that means you've occasionally got to get down, dirty, explicit and profane in covering the famous people that make the news.

Mischa Barton jetted off yesterday for Russia - which isn't far enough away from her ex-boyfriend Cisco Adler, as far as her parents are concerned.

We apologize ahead of time for this edition of Photo Finish.

Typically, we aim to give readers a challenge, to pit two reasonably attractive celebrities against each other in some type of fashion face-off. Half nude Kim Kardashian vs. haf nude Matthew McConaughey? There's a battle!

Mischa Barton and Cisco Adler are done.

No, this time they actually are. Really. But not over a nude pic.

You have to take your hat off to Cisco Adler.

Not because he has any redeeming qualities. For the opposite reason. He's becoming more famous by the day after a nude pic of him was found (along with a new Paris Hilton sex tape) in a certain hotel heiress' locker. And while he wouldn't have chosen for this to happen, Mischa Barton's beau is cool with it.

Hold the phone. Badler may not be done just yet.

According to Cisco Adler's rep, who must not be a very good rep if he is repping Cisco Adler, the 28-year-old dirtball and his girlfriend, Mischa Barton, are still together despite reports that she dumped him over a nude photo of him that surfaced last month.

Apparently, the naked truth hurts. Literally.

Mischa Barton has parted ways with her loser boyfriend, Cisco Adler, after nude pictures of the latter surfaced on the Internets.

The former star of The OC, Mischa Barton, and her dirtbag boyfriend, Cisco Adler, came within minutes of being part of a search and seizure warrant being executed on a medical marijuana distribution center in West Hollywood on January 17.

Stick-figure actress Mischa Barton steps out with her boyfriend at Beverly Hills restaurant La Scala on Wednesday. One can only wonder what she ate (and then threw up in the bathroom when she went to go "freshen up").

It's been a tough year for Mischa Barton.

She was killed off The OC, which is now creeping back to respectability after her departure. Ouch. Moreover, she lost about 15 more pounds in addition to her primary acting job. All that's left of her is a gaunt, skeletal frame.