90 Day Fiance Season 9, Episode 13 showed the couples as their wedding days loom.
Yvette and Mohamed have plenty of time, but an increasingly impatient Mohamed leaves Yve in tears.
Shaeeda is still balking at the prenup. Bilal prints it out for her to read … and it’s worse than she thought.
No one’s favorite couple, Emily and Kobe, has their own bad news: Emily thinks that she’s pregnant.
Miona has a conversation with Jibri’s mom about a new wedding “compromise.” The two women have very different ideas about how the talk went.
Kara and Guillermo have upgraded their wedding plans for one sweet reason, but Kara’s controlling habits are rearing their ugly head again.
Finally, Patrick and Thais are clashing over wedding plans as he keeps doing it all without her. Ultimately, he admits, it comes down to her not telling her dad.
Yvette Arellano and Mohamed Abdelhamed
With a month and a half before the K-1 visa deadline, these two are going on a trip to look at the venue. They have had to push back the wedding date by a couple of weeks because of this place, to Mohamed’s chagrin. Is it worth it?
It might be
The venue is beautiful, inside and out. We can understand why Yve has her heart set on getting married here … even if Mohamed does not.
Mohamed has his own priorities
Eager to get his documentation, he would rather get married ASAP even if it’s just a courthouse ceremony.
As for the ceremony itself
Yvette and Mohamed do not share the same beliefs, so her hope is to just have a friend — who is an ordained minister — officiate a non-denominational ceremony.
Mohammed would prefer a mosque
However, it sounds like this is not really about marrying in his faith. From his own words, it sounds like the priority is to marry sooner rather than later, and a mosque wedding could do that. Yve does not want that.
It feels very impersonal to Yve
She feels hurt that Mohamed doesn’t seem to care about their wedding or wedding ceremony. This is a big deal to her, but his focus is upon paperwork so that he can work and travel.
Mohamed doesn’t see the big deal
Not sharing priorities … that can be a problem. It can be even more hurtful when one of those priorities is a wedding.
Later, things get worse
Mohamed decides to text Yvette with the suggestion that, if she won’t move up the wedding so that he can get his documentation ASAP, maybe he should just have a new sponsor.
He doesn’t actually have one lined up
It’s not clear if that’s better or worse where Yve’s feelings are concerned, because those texts are cutting right to the bone.
Is Yvette just a means to an end?
That is how she feels — like he can just replace her at the drop of a hat so that he can get his documentation.
WOW, dude
Mohamed wants to be able to fly home and see his mom as soon as he can. He wants to work soon. Those are both admirable desires. It’s a shame that he finds the most hurtful ways imaginable to express that to his fiancee.
Later …
We see Yvette crying in her room. She feels like Mohamed sees her as replaceable.
Mohamed comes to “apologize”
Things quickly break down, as he repeatedly tells her that he doesn’t care about their wedding.
“I have another dream”
Mohamed is once again sounding an awful lot like he is less interested in Yvette and this marriage than he is in the potential benefits. Yikes.
He also threatens to leave
Now, anyone can break up at any time, and anyone can set boundaries if they like, but that doesn’t make this a nice thing to say.
Fine, go!
At this point, the “apology” has completely fallen apart.
Maybe he will!
Hilariously, Mohamed then asks her to buy him a plane ticket. Not unexpected from the guy who expected breakfast in bed.
Bilal Hazziez and Shaeeda Sween
Bilal is desperate to reclaim his “romantic” image, and takes Shaeeda out on a picnic. Shaeeda is singing his praises to the camera.
But …
Shaeeda is still reeling from her conversation with Shahidah, Bilal’s ex. She felt cornered and bullied in her own home, and that it was out of line for someone to talk to her about the prenup.
Bilal is surprised, but …
He does at least agree that the prenup conversation is not the business of any outsiders. BUT then he delves into the prenup topic, arguing that marriage is already a contract.
That’s not what she wanted
Shaeeda feels like Bilal is derailing the conversation with prenup talk. Total mood-killer. Hey, at least she’s not on a ferris wheel this time.
Eleven days later …
Bilal has a surprise for Shaeeda. Again, at least they’re not on a ferris wheel this time.
It’s the prenup!
Glancing an an email on Bilal’s phone from Bilal’s attorney is not really the same as reading something. Now, Shaeeda can read the full text of the prenup.
And … it feels really unfair to her
Shaeeda notes that she gave up her whole life to come here. Bilal’s prenup, which he constructed without her input, could be devastating to her in a divorce.
Bilal tries to argue that it shouldn’t matter
Once again playing word games, he says that since neither of them are planning on a divorce, the prenup doesn’t matter. That is obviously false, because he wouldn’t have had it written up for her to sign if it didn’t matter. One sometimes wonders if Bilal hears the things that he says, or if he just thinks that everyone around him is very dimwitted.
The prenup sounds ROUGH
We’re generally pretty pro-prenup, because a proper one (which would include input from both parties and their respective attorneys) gives couples control over important decisions instead of relying upon state laws. This one, Shaeeda says, means that she will come away with nothing from the marriage except money that she earns — which means that being a stay-at-home mom is not a safe option for her. Of course, she would know that Bilal has no intention of having another child … but he has been evasive about this instead of telling her the truth.
Emily Bieberly and Kobe Blaise
Kobe is still processing the hurt emotions that stemmed from learning about Emily’s back-up ring, but Emily suggests that he go shopping with her for “wedding stuff.”
It’s a ruse
Emily admits to him in the car that she is a couple of weeks late. Missing your period can be a tell-tale sign of pregnancy. She and Kobe are going to run “errands” so that she can take a pregnancy test out of the house, where none of her family will find it.
“Nah, you can’t be”
Kobe reacts with shock and then denial. He just spent a quarter of his money on an engagement ring, and right now, they are living with Emily’s parents while she is working. They are not ready for another kid.
Kobe cites that they took “precautions”
Emily quickly asks what he even means. They used pulling out and tracking her cycle, neither of which are effective means of birth control. And while even “real” birth control can fail, they didn’t even try — at Kobe’s insistence.
Kobe “refused” to allow Emily to take birth control
While acting exasperated that he even has to explain, Kobe repeats debunked beliefs that taking birth control will reduce long-term fertility. Come to think of it, this is not the first medical ignorance he has expressed, from thinking that a child within the recommended age range for breastfeeding is too old for it to trying to feed whole peanuts to a toddler. What’s weirder is that Emily went along with it.
This is not the right time
Emily fully admits that they are not ready for a second child … especially since her father’s one rule for her and Kobe was that she should not get pregnant while living at their house.
They stop at a pharmacy
Emily slips into the bathroom to take not one, but two tests. The results are not good.
Emily is pregnant
They are both clearly conflicted. They both want more kids, but not now. Emily also feels hurt that Kobe is so openly disappointed. Meanwhile, Kobe is wondering how he will face her father — but Emily wants to keep this a secret until she is showing.
Jibri Bell and Miona Bell
The scene opens with Jibri very conspicuously saging the house. While sage and its burning is a practice that goes back thousands of years across continents and for different purposes, an American doing so is generally trying to purge “negative energy.”
Jibri wants only the best vibes for tonight
Miona is going to talk to Jibri’s mom, Mahala, about their compromise. She wants it to go well.
They’re planning to elope
Miona tells Mahala that she and Jibri are going to put off the expensive wedding with guests. Instead, they will simply elope right now to save money. They’re not sure on the details despite the ticking clock, but are considering Joshua Tree. So this will be an out-of-state elopement.
Mahala and Brian are invited
However, there is not enough notice — obviously — for them to make the trip. Mahala is very diplomatic, saying that they will plan on attending the actual wedding, in a year. She also admits that Jibri and Miona choose “difficult” paths for themselves, which is an amazing euphemism for people making problems for themselves nonstop.
Miona tells Jibri that the talk went well
If anything, Mahala was perhaps too diplomatic. Sometimes, hiding your feelings out of a desire to be polite can feel like an endorsement.
Mahala talks to Brian
The episode switches between Miona telling Jibri how well the talk went and Mahala and Brian talking about what a messy “clusterf–k” Jibri and Miona’s relationship is.
They don’t think that their son is making good choices
Instead, this “compromise” feels like they’re still rushing into marriage … and giving Miona her perfect beach wedding with few concrete plans for the future. Something has to change, they think.
Kara Bass and Guillermo Rojer
With the tragic death of Guillermo’s brother, Kara decided that giving the wedding a boost might cheer him up. So they compromised. The wedding will now include 40 people, not 4, which means a lot more preparations to consider.
Apparently, most of the buildup to the wedding was drama-free
You can almost feel the editors’ frustration as we see a montage of wedding prep go by in mere seconds. Kara and Guillermo weren’t fighting or causing each other to be miserable, so the show glossed over what must have been weeks of pre-wedding stuff instead of dragging it out several episodes. However, in these final days before the nuptials, things are getting tense.
Kara is taking charge again
Apparently, she had been better about this, but something about wedding planning has activated her desire for control again, and she’s been making a lot of decisions without Guillermo. On the one hand, sure, she knows the town and where to order a cake and a lot of logistical stuff. But they could talk about this together, anyway.
Also, she could trust him
Kara seems to worry about a lot of details, from his hair — he’s getting a haircut that day — to his vows, right down to the English grammar. Weddings can bring out the worst in people, but it’s never easy to watch.
Guillermo heads out to get a haircut
His hair is pretty simple, and it’s cute that he talks about his hair routine. He has a very generic hairstyle, but he still has exacting standards for it.
Guillermo gets some relationship advice
Communication is key, which is something that he and Kara need to work on. Also, he shouldn’t expect things that are happening now to magically change after the wedding. So if he’s not happy about something, he should communicate it to his future wife.
Date night!
Both looking gorgeous, Kara and Guillermo head out for their last dinner as boyfriend and girlfriend. Next time that they go out, they will be husband and wife. Or will they?
Guillermo has some last-minute concerns
He wants to know if Kara is going to work on things after the wedding. The control issues are part of it. Another issue is how she acts when she wants to party — partying too hard, and being “mean” to Guillermo when he’s ready to go home. He has noticed her backsliding on some of this.
Kara does not respond well
She feels ambushed, which … in all fairness, yes, this was a bit of an ambush. To her, they already have enough stress without this confrontation … so she grows increasingly defensive and suggests that they just cut this date short and go home. Ouch.
Patrick Mendes and Thais Ramone
Patrick is setting things up for their wedding, but that may be a bit of a problem. He is still haunted by doubts after learning that Thais hasn’t told her dad.
Thais feels like he’s making every decision without her
This is her wedding, too (sound familiar?), but Patrick has settled on every detail on his own. He wants to do it February 22, 2022, because 22 is his “lucky number.” He wants to do it in Orlando since some of his siblings will already be there. Also? He hired someone to do her hair and makeup on the wedding day without giving her a chance to approve them.
Patrick does not respond well
“I’m the one paying for it,” he argues, as if this makes it his wedding alone. We know that Patrick has a chip on his shoulder from his traumatic childhood and that he is weird about things like making plans and money, but you don’t get to make unilateral decisions about your wedding just because you have more money. Not if you want to stay married for long, anyway.
Later, Thais meets up with friends
Remember when John threw that party full of strangers? Well, Kayla is no longer a stranger. She and Thais became friends. And Kayla introduced Thais to Anadia, who is also from Brazil.
Thais admits that her dad doesn’t know
She’s trying to protect his feelings and Patrick’s, because her dad doesn’t know that she’s marrying Patrick and Patrick doesn’t know that he doesn’t like him. But Thais’ only payoff from this is lots of passive aggressive blowback from Patrick. Her friends think that she should tell her dad, because they can’t imagine it going over well if she married Patrick before he knows.
Then, it’s time to talk about Patrick
Thais discusses her wedding planning woes. In particular, she is very uncomfortable with someone doing her hair and makeup for the wedding day without her choosing the woman herself. Patrick is so accustomed to doing these things himself that he just did it without regard for her feelings. That’s not good.
Later, we get some insight into Patrick
Patrick talks about running some things by Thais, only for John to suggest that he skip that step and make even more decisions himself. Maybe John is actively trying to sabotage the relationship, or maybe he’s just trying to troll his brother, but either way, one can better understand Patrick when they see the sort of advice that he’s getting.
Patrick tries on clothes, which is entertaining on its own
Meanwhile, he admits to John that he and Thais have not yet told her dad, but promises that they will before the wedding.
“When?”
John pushes Patrick on this topic, and says that Patrick is keeping things “bottled up” like he does instead of facing reality. I don’t often agree with John … but he has a point about how he and Patrick operate.
Later, Thais asks Patrick if he’s going to work on being less controlling
She points out that they are spending this time to get to know one another and decide if they will marry. Thais has seen a side to Patrick that she never witnessed in Brazil.
Patrick argues that he’s just the best person for wedding planning
Because Thais has not fully mastered English, he is the one making the calls. Apparently, he feels that there’s no time for him and Thais to discuss decisions before he makes them.
The stylist comes up again
Thais notes that he mentioned the stylist possibility to her, and then ten minutes later had already signed the contract without Thais’ approval. Why won’t he let her participate in her own wedding? There is, it turns out, an answer.
Patrick admits that it’s about her dad
He can’t wrap his head around why she hasn’t told her father, and because of his own family baggage, thinks that this means that she’s not serious about marrying him. He suggests that her telling her dad will make him feel more comfortable involving her. That’s a weird ultimatum to make, and it sounds like an excuse, but we’d like to see these two work through their issues.