Jenelle Evans ... well, bless her heart, she doesn't have the best luck in love.
She's never once, in her whole entire adult life, dated a good guy.
She hasn't even been with a decent guy, they've all been awful.
While she could fill a book -- several books even -- about her misadventures in romance, this time she's speaking out against just one of those guys.
And judging by the things she has to say, she's still just furious about him ...
Ah, Memories ...
Hey, do you want to do a quick recap of Jenelle's love life? That would be fun, right? It will also set the stage for the drama we're going to be talking about today.
Oh Hey, Andrew
The first guy we ever saw her with was Andrew Lewis, the creeper who got her pregnant with Jace. He was too old to be messing with her and he was also pretty absent. When he was around, he wasn't very nice to Jenelle, but it wasn't too long after Jace was born that he disappeared entirely.
Miss You, Kieffer
After that she got involved with Kieffer Delp, who is widely regarded to be the best guy she was ever with. Not because he was actually a good person -- he did introduce her to heroin, after all -- but because he was the one who actually seemed to like her.
Jenelle and Kieffer did break up and get back together a few times, and during some of those breakups, she was with a guy named Gary Head who she accused of domestic violence by way of strangulation with a bedsheet, so ...
The Courtland Era
When she was done with both Kieffer and Gary, Courtland Rogers entered the picture. They had a pretty volatile relationship that all happened when Teen Mom 2 wasn't filming, but essentially they did heroin together, got married, and split up during a pretty short period of time. Classic Jenelle, right?
While she was still legally married to Courtland, she met Nathan Griffith and decided to have a baby with him real quick, because apparently Nathan's underwear modeling and his hobby of driving drunk just really did something for her.
David Eason, AKA Uncle Bad Touch
Shortly after she and Nathan broke up (like, a few weeks after), she met David Eason on Tinder and named him her brand new soulmate. David's horrible qualities will be freshest in our memory, obviously, but when she got with him he had a criminal record and a history of girlfriends accusing him of domestic violence, and he only got worse.
Good Ol' Herb
And finally we have Herb Wilkinson, some guy from Boston who only managed to hang for a week or two. We never got to see him on the show, of course, and he wasn't around long enough for us to learn much about him, but from what we did see, he's no winner either.
Here We Go!
But we're about to hear a lot more about Herb, because he was the subject of Jenelle's latest rant!
Like we said, Herb is some guy from Boston, and really all we know about him is that he's 23 years old, he struggles with addiction, and he used to have a habit of saying some pretty awful things about Jenelle on Twitter.
Like, he wrote things like "Do the USA a favor and kill yourself" and "I hope you get a non curable flesh eating disease you c--t." That's the kind of guy we're talking about.
You Know How Choices Be
Still, Jenelle thought he would be a good choice for a new soulmate, or at least she did for a bit. She traveled up to Boston to visit him and everything.
Not Working Out
But just as quickly as it began, the romance was over, and now Jenelle has to go through the trouble of landing ANOTHER new guy, because goodness knows she can't stand being single for any significant amount of time.
(And yes, we know there's tons of evidence that suggests she's back with David, but can we please not think about that right now? This story is depressing enough as it is.)
But what happened with Herb? Who called it off? Why did things end so fast? WHAT'S THE STORY?!
Well, for some reason, Herb has decided to really start going after Jenelle this week. We're not sure if something happened or if he just decided he wanted some attention, but he's been pretty mean for the past couple of days.
He called her "f-cking repulsive" when someone asked about her on Instagram, and clarified that "That means who she is as a human, and her physical self."
Don't Hold Back, Herb
In another comment, he wrote "Most socially awkward human ever. Can't hold a conversation. Obsessed with herself and thinks she's still 'famous.' It's kind of hilariously sad. Nothing about her is interesting. At all. Boring in ALL aspects. I mean ALL."
"She has 3 kids with 3 men," he said in yet another comment. "All I can say is she makes terrible life choices. I'm no saint, but she makes me look like St Michael. She's a clown that's SO uncomfortable in her own skin and HATES the fact that I ghosted her."
And Jenelle simply will not let that stand.
Go Get 'Em, Girl
She shared this on her Instagram story last night, using a shot from A Star is Born to describe her trip to see Herb. Doesn't look so fun, huh?
She then decided to do a quick little Q&A with her followers, and it was pretty clear what she wanted to talk about.
Getting Some Details
Someone asked her what happened with Herb, and she said "Wasted my money on an arrogant douche bag. Literally was either passed out drunk or telling his friends on the phone 'he's with Jenelle' or 'say hey to my friends!'"
Another follower asked what she did while she was in Boston, and she replied "Not anything fun lol sat in an Airbnb Facetiming my friends because I was soooo bored."
It turn out she has seen what Herb has been saying about her -- no surprise there -- but she said "my ex just begged me to be nice so I'm going to."
Not Feeling Great
As for how she's been doing lately in general, it seems she's been "very anxious lately" because of "people testing my patience lol."
She answered a few other questions -- stuff about how she misses being on TV and has been watching a lot of Netflix -- but when someone told her that Herb is saying that he's the one who dumped her, she said "If only you saw my texts."
What's the Truth?!
But just earlier today, Herb posted a little something on his own Instagram story that read "Don't talk sh-t when I have pictures and videos. #steppedOnHotPocket"
So ... the only way to interpret that awful message is that he's threatening to release some nudes of her, right? There's nothing else that could mean?
We're not sure why things have been getting so nasty between Jenelle and Herb now, but it definitely looks like it's not going to be slowing down anytime soon.
So hold on tight, friends ... we don't have a great feeling about this.