Things aren't going so well for Jenelle Evans and David Eason right now.
And sure, things have never been truly good down on the swamp, but they've certainly been better than this.
Last month, David was arrested twice within the span of a couple of days -- once for not showing up for a court date, and once for allegedly assaulting a friend of Jenelle's.
More and more details have been coming out about that second arrest, but now David is officially sharing his side of the story.
And what a story it is ...
Here's David posing for his mug shot after being arrested last month for assault with a deadly weapon and communicating threats.
Where to Start?
But how did things get to that point? Let's take a look back.
David has been accused of being violent many, many times -- his ex managed to get a restraining order against him for herself and their son after telling a judge he was abusive, and we've heard two 911 calls from Jenelle concerning him.
In one of those calls, she said that he'd knocked her down and she thought her collarbone was broken, and in the other she said that she'd locked him out of their home because he was scaring her and he was beating the door down.
When she left him last fall, she got her own restraining order against him after telling a judge that he'd been abusive and she feared for her life.
His violent history isn't just made up of allegations, either -- we all remember what happened to poor, poor Nugget.
So when the story came out last month about how he'd allegedly hit Jenelle's friend with a pistol, it wasn't exactly hard to believe.
A Quick Recap
We first heard about the incident when Jenelle reached out to a website to give a statement -- in the first version of the story, Jenelle had decided to leave David again and went back to The Land with a couple of friends to get some of her belongings.
There was some kind of argument about David's car keys -- he apparently believed that Jenelle or one of her friends had taken them -- and David ended up hitting one of the friends with a pistol.
So Upset, Dude
At the time, Jenelle said "I'm shaking and saddened by this, it's time for me to move on from this relationship and find happiness for my kids and myself elsewhere." She also claimed she was going to get another restraining order.
That didn't happen, of course -- we're not sure exactly when she went back to him, but paparazzi got photos of them together at a dog park a week after his arrest, which means that Jenelle wanted to send a public message that she was standing by her man.
While Jenelle was making up with her gross husband, the police report was released, and that's where we heard that David was accused of hitting Jenelle's friend with a pistol twice, once on the neck and once on the back, and for telling him “I will blow your f--king brains out.”
We also learned that David had filed assault charges of his own against the friend because he supposedly assaulted him with a coat rack.
He went to court last week over all of this, and it doesn't seem like too much happened, although it does seem like the charges weren't dropped and he'll have to go back for a trial.
Seems like a great time to share his side of the story, huh?!
According to David, he was looking for his keys when Jenelle showed up with her friends. He asked everyone if they'd seen the keys, then he asked the friends to leave and told them that they're not welcome in his home.
And no, that doesn't really make sense, but this is his story and he's sticking to it.
It's Going Down
So he asked them to leave, one of the guys pushed him, and David said that "I pushed back and he pushed me back, this other guy attacked me with my coat hanger I made out of rail road spikes that was hanging from my wall, he swang it over my head and I tried stopping it, that's when the spikes went into my hand and hit my wrist and forearm."
"They could have killed me if one of those nails went into my head if I wouldn't have blocked it," he added, "I have the right to protect myself against strangers who attack me in my own home."
What a Timeline
He was arrested after the incident, but it was for missing the unrelated court date. Police told him then to file a report if he'd been assaulted. He was released, then arrested again for the assault charges. Police told him again to file a report.
Standing Up for Himself
"I filed the report on this guy with the police department and he is also being charged with assault, the difference is I was protecting myself in my own home and it was self-defense," David explained.
The Plot Thickens
"Who would let a half-drunk guy wielding railroad spikes at your head get away?" he asked. "They had just come from a bar having drinks so it's obvious this guy wasn't in his right mind."
He complained that "Everyone thinks I was the one in the wrong just because I've been too busy making sure my family, wife, and kids are good, I don't care to spread lies to reporters for fame and money."
So Much Defamation
"I'm a Husband, I'm a father and that's where my focus is at, I didn't want to be petty and show the world these pictures or put the blame publicly but these guys have been defaming me and my family and even bringing up my children and that's not cool."
Poor Dave :(
Oh yeah, about "these pictures" -- he shared some photos with the site of a cut on his hand and some bruising on his arm, and also a dent in his door that all came from the alleged coat rack attack.
He concluded his statement by saying "I'm going to wait for my day in court and let my injuries, my house, and my self-defense plea do the talking, hopefully, the judge understands my side and my wife, my kids and myself are allowed to move forward."
So there's an awful lot to unpack here, right?
Like it's interesting that he never even mentions the pistol, right? That could definitely be at the advice of his lawyer, but it's still weird because it's such an important detail.
Is his story really that he was just hanging out, looking for his keys when Jenelle pulled up with two guys and after David asked them about the keys, he asked them politely to leave and one of them grabbed a coat rack and tried to hit him with it?
And in self-defense, he pulled out a gun, hit the guy twice with it, and told him “I will blow your f--king brains out"?
David likes to play the victim after he does something terrible -- remember when he actually cried in an interview about killing Nugget and tried to say that he didn't understand that it was wrong to murder your wife's dog?
Looking Forward to It
We'll just have to see how all of this plays out in court ... because right now, it seems like a great big mess.