Well, we knew this would happen eventually.
We just didn’t think it would happen quite so soon.
That happened on Monday, and folks, this one is a doozy, even by Jenelle and David standards.
Check out the latest insanity from everyone’s least favorite former reality stars:
Back At It Jenelle Evans and David Eason are at it again. And this time, for our amusement, the gruesome twosome is battling it out on social media!
Still the Same The problem, it seems, is that Jenelle and David are still Jenelle and David, meaning they have terrible tempers and seem to hate every second of raising three kids and 47,000 farm animals together.
The Whiner The latest round of trouble started about three weeks ago when David complained that he and Jenelle can never find a babysitter, and thus, can never go on a date together.
Are They Looking For FREE Babysitters?! It’s anyone’s guess as to where Jenelle and David are getting all of this money for babysitters and nights out, considering neither of them works, but we’ll get to that later.
Good News For Bad People Anyway, it looks as though Jenelle and David either found a sitter or reluctantly dragged their kids along, because they were able to enjoy a boating excursion over the weekend.
Awful, As Usual Jenelle announced this news with the kind of status update that reminds us all how much she sucks, writing, “Well while all of you are rioting and destroying your precious cities, I’ll be far far away on my boat away from all of you.”
King of the Land But like Jack and Rose and before them, it seems the Easons day at sea took an unexpected turn for the worse.
Capsizing But instead of an iceberg, the excursion unexpectedly plowed right into David’s titanic temper.
Spilling the Tea (MTV) Later that day, Jenelle posted, “God forbid I hangout with my friends [laughing emojis]” on Facebook.
And Here We Go … She kept it vague, and she could’ve been talking about anyone (even though we all knew she was talking about her husband), but Angry Dave simply couldn’t resist taking the bait.
Letting It All Out “God forbid I get a babysitter and try to have a day with my wife before she flips out and deserted me for her drug addict whore friend,” Eason responded.
Besties Against Dave The “drug addict” that David is referring to appears t be Jenelle’s on-again, off-again bestie, Tori Rhyne, who’s been spending a LOT of time on The Land in recent weeks.
Tantrum King As far as we can tell, the boating excursion went poorly, and Jenelle and Tori decided to set out on the town without David, leaving him to fill his diaper on The Land.
Solid Point (Getty) Jenelle then rather aptly pointed out that even if he HAD been invited David has no money for things like bars and babysitters.
Bodied “At least my friend can pay for her own bills … uhm … when’s the last time you paid for ANYTHING? History repeats itself lol,” Evans posted.
She Never Learns Of course, as many have pointed out, that was sort of a self-burn, as Jenelle is the one who took his loser ass back.
Back and Forth “I want to tell you guys that David has never abused the children, he’s never abused me. I’ve always had disagreements and those would turn into big arguments,” she said at the time, despite previously swearing under oath that he DID abuse the children.
The Cycle Continues Anyway, David and Jenelle can’t afford to get divorced, so we’re sure this will all blow over until they’re at each other’s throats again by this weekend.
Just the Worst In the meantime, they can bond over one thing they definitely have in common — an unwavering belief in white supremacy.
Of Course She Is Yes, Jenelle is one of those people who believes that the REAL crime is not the murder of George Floyd but the smashed Target window in Charlotte that she heard about on the news.
Here She Goes “I’m at home in the country… far away from any cities,” Jenelle wrote in a recent Instagram with former 16 and Pregnant star Whitney Purvis. “It’s a scary time right now, especially for our kids.”
At Least on The Land The Violent Psychos Are People You Know “I’m not in Nashville anymore and back in NC. I’m glad I’m back in the country and away from people. This world is getting sadder and sadder each day,” Evans continued.
The Educator (MTV) After revealing that she’s keeping her children far away from any cities, Evans added, “BUT I WILL educate my children what is happening from a far [sic] and that racism is wrong in all forms… there’s no need to put your child’s life in danger tho.”
The More Things Change So Jenelle is still proudly ignorant and filled with misplaced rage. That’s terrible news for her kids, and for society in general.
United In Ignorance But it’s probably great news for her marriage. At least these two can always bond over their bigotry.