Amber Portwood: I'm Suicidal and It's MTV's Fault!

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Amber Portwood is going through a difficult time.

Of course, as many fans have pointed out, it seems that Amber is pretty much always going through a hard time.

Though many of her problems are self-inflicted, and she seems reluctant to atone for her abusive and violent past, Amber's struggle with postpartum depression has earned her the sympathy of many Teen Mom OG viewers.

However, many of those fans have been discouraged by Amber's continued tendency to blame others -- including her employers -- for the state of her mental health.

Take a look:


1. Amber's Angst

Amber's Angst
Amber has been quite open about her various mental health issues, including her struggles with postpartum depression.

2. Tough Times

Tough Times
Amber has been struggling with depression for years, and she said it's hit particularly hard in the months since her son James was born.

3. A Shocking Scene

A Shocking Scene
The latest episode of Teen Mom OG showed Amber confessing that she had recently considered taking her own life.

4. Self-Reflection

“I didn’t accept that I had postpartum in any way," Amber told her cousin Krystal of that dark time.

5. A New (Bad) Feeling

A New (Bad) Feeling
"I just didn’t know what it felt like because I had never experienced that before,” Portwood continued.

6. Taking a Toll

Taking a Toll
Asked how her mental health is affecting her relationship with Andrew Glennon, Amber revealed that she and Andrew have endured several rough patches in recent weeks.

7. "Different"

Opening up to her cousin, Amber said her relationship with Andrew has "been different" since James was born.

8. Alienation of Affection

Alienation of Affection
"We aren’t as lovely," Amber said. (We assume she meant "lovey.")

9. Close Call

Close Call
Amber went on to reveal that her plans to take her own life were thwarted by Glennon, who seemed to sense that something was seriously amiss.

10. Intuition

“There was a night that I was waiting for him and James to go to bed so I could kill myself and for some odd reason, like, he could feel it and he was like, ‘I’m not going to bed,’” she recalled.

11. An Ongoing Problem

An Ongoing Problem
Amber concluded that anecdote by saying, “It doesn’t feel good to be alive right now.”

12. Mom-Shaming

Amber went on to reveal that TMOG fans have pressured her to get well for the sake of her daughter.

13. Do It For Leah

Do It For Leah
“I have people saying me, ‘Why couldn’t you do this for Leah?’" she said.

14. Somewhat Confusing Message

Somewhat Confusing Message
"And it’s like, ‘I was young and stupid,’” Amber explained of her struggle to get well. “I don’t want to be like that for the rest of my life.”

15. Biting the Hand That Feeds

Biting the Hand That Feeds
From there, Amber fell back into one of her favorite refrains -- she believes MTV and Teen Mom producers are largely to blame for her mental health issues.

16. Credit Where It's Due

Credit Where It's Due
She also revealed that she feels she's not getting enough credit for her recent efforts to better herself.

17. Begging For Praise

Begging For Praise
“The person I am today is not being noticed as much as it should be,” Amber claimed.

18. Bold Claim

Bold Claim
“This show has ruined my name," Amber said, referring to TMOG.

19. Misrepresented?

"This show has not shown who I am as a person," Amber said.

20. Focus on the Negative

Focus on the Negative
"They don’t show the funny side of me, they show bad mom, they show all that s–t, they show the struggle, they show me crying, they show postpartum," Amber continued.

21. Actually Quitting?!

Actually Quitting?!
"So I go, okay, that’s what’s going on in my life so I guess that’s true. I’m over it," she concluded, seemingly hinting that her time on the show is coming to an end.

22. Nothing Official

Nothing Official
Thus far, Amber has yet to confirm that she's quitting, but sources close to the reality star claim that she's "weighing her options." We wish her all the best no matter what path she chooses.

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Amber Portwood Biography

Amber Portwood Admits that She's a Bad Mom
Amber Portwood is a star on MTV's Teen Mom. She is the mother of Leah Leann Shirley, whose father is Gary Shirley, Amber's on-off fiance... More »
Anderson, Indiana
Full Name
Amber Portwood