Note to all members of Real Housewives franchise:
Please stick to your day job.
We never thought we’d say that, we never thought we’d encourage Kim Zolciak, Melissa Gorga and others to actually act all rich and spoiled and snobby.
But if the alternative is for them to embark on a singing career… well, the scary proof is in the following pudding. That’s no alternative at all.
Check out these examples of Real Housewives trying really hard to be singers:
Kim Zolciak – “Google Me”
What an amazingly hilarious song. Listen to Kim Zolciak’s sing “Google Me” in this video. Yes, this is meant to be a real single.
LuAnn de Lesseps – “Girl Code (Don’t Be So Uncool)”
LuAnn de Lesseps has come out with her latest single. Don’t tell us you aren’t dying to hear “Girl Code (Don’t Be So Uncool).”
Kim Zolciak – “Tardy for the Party”
It doesn’t get much worse than this. Try to listen to Kim Zolciak sing “Tardy for the Party” in the above video.
Countess Luann – “Money Can’t Buy You Class”
Money Can’t Buy You Class, people. Countess Luann tries to make that point in this single.
Countess Luann – “Chic, C’est La Vie”
Countess Luann didn’t just release the song “Chic, C’est La Vie.” She made it into an entire music video!
Melissa Gorga – “On Display”
Can Melissa Gorga actually sing? Check out “On Display” and decide for yourself!
Kenya Moore – “Gone With The Wind Fabulous”
This must be seen to be believed. Watch Kenya Moore perform “Gone With The Wind Fabulous.”
Danielle Staub – “Real Close”
See, Danielle Staub doesn’t just strip! She also pretends as if she can sing!
Simon van Kampen – “I Am Real”
We agree, Simon van Kampen: You are real. A really bad singer, that is! HA!