Back in January, Farrah Abraham assaulted a security guard while she was out partying at an LA nightclub.
She was promptly pinned to the floor and held there until the cops arrived, at which time, the shrieking mother of one was cuffed and hauled off to jail.
Thankfully, video of this incident exists for our amusement.
Most celebs in Ms. Abraham’s shoes would probably just take the L, issue an apology, and check into rehab to be treated for their obvious drinking problem.
But not Farrah.
She’s checking into rehab alright, but not because she wants to make sure that she never gets hammered and attacks a stranger again.
No, Farrah will be spending the next four weeks being treated for the trauma she suffered while being pinned to the floor and arrested.
“#traumatreatmentcenter 28 days here we go- I’ll let you know if it works! With healing," Farrah captioned a recent Instagram video.
“Our healing is a true way of showing our wealth and our success," she told fans in the clip.
"So I am taking time for my healing. I have ignored people for over 11 months after having a sexual assault and having my whole body break down, my whole brain break down.”
Well, demonstrating your "wealth and success" to the world is not actually a good reason for checking into rehab, but at least Farrah is encouraging people to take their mental health seriously.
As with so many other Farrah videos, it’s not totally clear what she’s trying to say here.
Anyway, some commenters think that this is Farrah’s way of bolstering her argument for when she eventually sues the club and security guard who got her arrested.
Whatever the case, there’s no real risk involved on Farrah’s part.
It seems like the treatment facility is offering her a free stay if she shouts them out on social media, so she just has to show up and talk about herself for a month.
Plus, she’s been looking for an excuse to escape from Sophia for a while.
Look, we wouldn’t usually make fun of somebody’s reasons for checking into rehab, and we sincerely hope that Farrah gets whatever kind of help she’s looking for.
But everything that Farrah does seems so calculated, and her decision to seek treatment appears to be no exception.
Abraham launched an unprovoked attack against someone else, and now she’s claiming that she was traumatized because it didn’t work out for her.
That’s the kind of narcissistic thinking that we’ve come to expect from Farrah, and it makes it hard to take anything she says or does seriously.
But who knows?
Maybe the staff at this facility will force Farrah to confront her only real enemy — herself — and for the first time since she became famous as a teen, she’ll actually be forced to answer some hard questions.
Of course, if anything like that happens, she’ll probably just up and leave.
Maybe we should stop expecting so much from this experience and instead just be grateful that Farrah will be out of our lives for a month!