Game of Thrones Recap: Nothing Happens (And It Was Awesome?)

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With only five episodes remaining in Game of Thrones, one would think the epic drama wouldn't have time for everyone to basically sit around the campfire and tell stories.

But that's exactly what transpired on Game of Thrones Season 8 Episode 2.

There were no shocking deaths, no huge secrets revealed (to the audience) and really no storyline advancement of any kind.

jaime and

Instead, with the Night King expected to arrive at Winterfell within hours, there was only a look at what nearly all our beloved characters were thinking the evening before their presumed death.

For long-time followers of the books and the series, this was likely a welcome, tear-filled hour in which they got to slow down and appreciate the journey/saga of the past several years.

For those who tune in wondering whose head will be separated from its body next, this likely felt like a giant waste of time.

On which end of the spectrum did you fall?

jon plots

The two major revelations from the installment were both follow-ups to how the Season 8 premiere concludes:

Jaime Lanniser stood in front of Dany, whose father he murdered, and Sansa, whose brother he shoved out a window, and pleaded his case.

He explained that he was a changed man and Cersei was a liar and he just wanted to help fight for the survival of mankind at this point.

Dany was still itching to avenge her dad's death, until Brienne stood up and delivered an all-time speech about how honorable Jaime acted when he held her as his captive and how she would gladly stand by her side in this fight.

This was enough for Sansa to hear and Jaime's life was spared.

This led to one of the most emotional scenes of all-time, as Jaime later knighted his unexpected best friend and most loyal supporter:

knighted

Jon, meanwhile, chose the worst time ever to tell Dany about his heritage and his true identity.

He shocked her with this information mere seconds before the horn blared to alert everyone that the Night King was about to make his violent presence felt.

Dany was less taken aback that she'd been banging her nephew and more stunned that Jon ist he rightful heir to the Iron Throne.

This ought to make for some awkward pillow talk if both survive the war to come.

A Khaleesi Moment

Elsewhere, though, we weren't kidding above: Everyone just sat around and talked.

Tyrion noted the irony that he and his brother were at Winterfell, essentially fighting for the Starks after trying to have that family wiped out for so many years.

Sam reminded the few remaining men of The Wall that he has killed a White Walker and that Gilly and Little Sam would be safe in the crypts while he helped battle the dead.

Arya totally had sex with Gendry because she wanted to experience intercourse before she died.

Sansa and Dany has a nice talk, bonding over their hatred of Cersei and love for Jon... until the former reminded the latter that she wants to control the North even after Dany is anointed to the Iron Throne.

Tormund told a story about how he killed a giant as a boy and then suckled at the teat of the giant's wife for three months and that's why he's so big and strong.

No, really, he told this story.

Gilly In the Cold

Sam gifted Jorah with his family's sword as a tribute to Jorah's father -- and because it was too heavy for Sam to use in battle.

Grey Worm promised to take Missandei to the beach after the major fight was over.

And, lastly, Tyrion watched from the top of a castle wall when the White Walkers showed up and the episode cut to black.

Were you among those disappointed that no one of significance has died yet? That we just spent an entire hour chatting about feelings and bringing up memories instead of drawing swords and flying around with dragons?

Or was this the perfect appetizer before what appears to be the ultimate main course of blood and death next week?

The ideal build-up for a battle seven-plus seasons in the making?

Becaus the point of Game of Thrones isn't simply that lots of people die; it's that lots of people who we've grown to know and love die after a legendary voyage, one the viewers have gone through right along with everyone on screen.

Death may be inevitable, but this was the rare opportunity for Tyrion, Davos and company to actually stop and appreciate their lives.

Onion Soup, Anyone?

Because, as teased in the trailer below, there's no debating it at this point: Winter is absolutely, positively, 100% coming in a few days.

And ain't no way most people are making it out alive.

Check out the preview now:

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