If you’ve been watching the show this season, then you’re probably aware that producers keep introducing the Staten Island Hamster into the festering rodent cage that is Jersey Shore Family Vacation.
Thus far, the decision to have Angelina Pivarnick haul her duct-taped garbage bag full of clothes all over the country in pursuit of the housemates’ friendship has yielded mixed results.
Sure, Angelina remains annoying AF, but if it weren’t for the rage she brings to the table, the show would be nothing but non-stop Ronnie baby mama drama.
Plus, having packed up her Hefty Cinch-Sack and exited the Shore house (twice!) early on in the show’s original run, Angelina provides an interesting link to the guidos’ past.
The rest of the cast has mostly moved on from the pettiness of the pasts, but Angelina is still all about that mess.
It’s sort of like if you met up with your best friend from third grade and found out that paste is still his favorite food.
Try not to think too hard about that Angelina/paste eating analogy as we continue with this story. Trust us.
As we discussed last week, Angelina hooked up with Vinny — and, well, just about every other guy in the house during her initial, short-lived tenure on JS.
It was all thought to be ancient history, but now, a new rumor holds that Angie and Vin visited the smush room together while filming the show’s current season.
That may sound like a tough one to swallow (again, we apologize for our choice of imagery), but believe it or not, Vinny’s most trusted confidante says it’s totally plausible.
“I believe it, I don’t know, I believe it,” Pauly said, when asked about the rumor by OK! magazine.
“He’s allowed to hook up with women, just no other guys,” the DJ joked, referring to his bromance with Vinny.
Kidding aside, Pauly proceeded to point out that Angelina might be in trouble if it turns out the rumors are true:
“She’s engaged, though, so if they did [hook up], that’s a problem for her.”
Perhaps we’ll find out later in the season if Vinny and Angelina really went there — or perhaps not.
Either way, the housemates’ romantic past has been a frequent topic of conversation on the current season of JSFV.
“You guys fight all the time. You have like, one more hate bang to get out,” Ronnie joked on last week’s episode.
But unlike Stormy Daniels, who seems to vividly recall the horrid fungal dimensions of Donald Trump’s penis, Angelina is suffering from a severe case of dong-related amnesia when it comes to Vinny.
“No, I’m not f–king DTF anymore, Vin,” she said on Thursday’s installment.
“Been there, done that with you. I honestly don’t remember your dick. I’m not being mean. I’m not saying it’s small. I’m saying I don’t remember!”
Sounds like Angelina may be in need of a crash course on Vinny’s peen.
Of course, in this case, we guess you’d call it a smush course.