Twenty years from now, when you're enjoying a dinner of roast cockroach at the tree stump that serves as your kitchen table, your children will ask about what led to this moment, and you'll finally have to tell them about the election of 2016.
You won't want to leave anything out:
You'll talk about Russia, #FakeNews, nasty women, bad hombres, and of course, the connection between Taylor Swift and Donald Trump.
That last part might not seem important now, but it'll be essential for your twins, Barack and Bernie, to understand why Taylor announces the contestants for the annual Hunger Games, while her former rival, Katy Perry, is pelted with rotten fruit in the town square every day at noon.
You'll explain to them that while Katy spoke out against Trump (who will then be a head in a jar serving his sixth term in the Oval Office), Taylor decided not to get involved, possibly due to her indirect ties to the Donald's family.
The extent of the TayTrump alliance may have been overstated (we doubt Swift actually cast a vote for him, as has been rumored), but the fact remains that Taylor's bestie, Karlie Kloss, is engaged to Jared Kushner's brother, and it's hard to believe that relationship didn't play a role in the singer's decision to keep mum as freakin' every other celebrity on the planet spoke out.
Anyway, if there's a silver lining to be found in the black cloud of doom and despair that is the 2016 election, it may be that the outcome only exacerbated the ongoing feud between Swift and Perry, which has served as an ongoing source of entertainment for several years now.
In case you had any doubt that the bad blood between Taylor and Katy is still pumping, Perry took dead aim at her rival in a recent interview with Vogue.
Check out this excerpt from the piece:
“I don’t think you have to shout it from the rooftops but I think you have to stand for something, and if you’re not standing for anything,” she adds pointedly, perhaps aiming at some of her deliberately apolitical confreres, “you’re really just serving yourself, period, end of story.
"‘California Gurls’ and fluffy stuff would be completely inauthentic to who I am now and what I’ve learned. I do believe we need a little escapism, but I think that it can’t all be that. If you have a voice you have a responsibility to use it now, more than ever.”
Yes, in case you missed the diss, Vogue went and spelled it out for you:
This here is some shade.
In context, the burn is even more apparent, as that quote comes directly comes directly on the heels of Katy discussing the importance of "innuendo" and "subtext" in getting your message across.
She's basically teaching a master class in trash-talk here, folks.
You may want to take notes.