Brandi Glanville has a new reality show starting tonight, and the early buzz isn't exactly breaking the Internet, which means the thirst for last-minute free publicity is very, very real.
You may have seen the promos:
Brandi and Leann Rimes' ex-husband, Dean Sheremet, compete in a cooking competition with Ray J and Andre Dice Clay, apparently for no other reason than that 2016 wants to prove right out of the gate that it's capable of being just as awful as its predecessor.
We first heard about My Kitchen Rules (Yes, that apparently that struck someone as a gangbusters title.) way back in May, when rumors that Brandi and Dean were dating began to circulate online.
Turns out, they were just filming this show together.
Obviously, the revenge boning story made for a far more interesting narrative, which is probably why it went un-challenged for so long.
Sadly, the reality of the situation is that Brandi and Dean won't be doing any boning unless they decide to serve trout.
But that doesn't mean Brandi won't be using her status as a tabloid staple to promote this act of midseason desperation by the Fox network.
There's already been talk of Brandi drunk on the red carpet at a premiere event, because getting drunk in public is on the short list of things that still make her mildly interesting.
The only other item on that list is her feud with LeAnn Rimes, and it seems she intends to milk that for everything it's worth, as well.
Those who have seen the show say Brandi and Dean start taking jabs at their exes right out of the gate.
“Her ex-husband had sex with my ex-wife,” Dean reportedly tells the camera by way of introduction.
“And then we went through the divorce part of it very publicly together,” Glanville adds, for the sake of those who are still confused about why the hell these two are on a team together.
“Everyone assumes that we’re hooking up,” Sheremet says at one point, clarifying:
“We’re really good friends.”
Apparently, co-star Naomi Judd even gets in on the awkwardness, joking about LeAnn:
“Not very good taste in men, but she has a beautiful voice.”
So yeah, that's the kind of scripted "humor" you can expect on My Kitchen Rules.
We doubt that LeAnn and Eddie Cibrian will be watching - or anyone else, for that matter.