Andi Doherty is a British working-class bloke like any other, but with one important difference...
Doherty has a Stalin-like taste for vodka and a Churchill-esque tolerance for the stuff.
Doherty gained a lot of attention this week for the following video in which he claims to polish off an entire liter of Absolut vodka in just over eight seconds:
Obviously, we'd like to take this time to discourage any of our readers from attempting a similar stunt at home.
Come to think of it, we probably should've put that warning above the video.
So, um ... if you just walked into the room and found this article still open on your loved one's laptop, our condolences.
No, no - all kidding aside near-suicidal binge-drinking like what this dude just did to himself is no laughing matter.
So what the hell possessed him to attempt such an idiotic stunt?
Well, Dorfman says he wanted to make his way into the Guinness Book of World Records, of course!
You may be saying to yourself:
"Wow, Guinness will publish your name for doing something that stupid?"
The answer, of course is, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
It seems Andi should've done a bit of research before he embarked on his noble quest, as despite the fact that the publishers of the famed records book are the also the brewers of the same-named delicious beer, they don't encourage Leaving Las Vegas-style assaults against your own liver.
"I did it to prove that I'm the biggest drinker in the world and I'm fully up for doing it in front of Guinness World Record officials to become the verified champion,"Andi told the the Mirror in an interview that presumably consisted solely of the question, Why?!
"I chucked up the entire bottle the second time I tried it that quick."
Dorfman - a 30-year-old dad who says he filmed the clip as part as part of his Iron Liver YouTube series - adds that he's out to defend his reputation as "the biggest drinker in the world."
"I can drink the most vodka in the world, no doubt about that, my friends call me a land pirate because of my love for rum," Dorfman says.
We guess that explains the flag and the fact that he's the only UK resident to own a leather Oakland Raiders hat.
But it doesn't explain, well ... anything else about his life decisions.
Hey, at least it's better than that time 50 Cent fed vodka to a cat.