Dane Cook: I Am NOT Banging Miley Cyrus!

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Yesterday, we reported on the sad, strange, confusing rumors that Miley Cyrus is hooking up with Dane Cook.

Miley's the type of gal who will go to town on a vibrator during a magazine photo shoot, so we briefly thought it might be possible that she would be willing to allow Cook to drip his sour stink of failure, Milwaukee's Best and Jack Link's all over her.

Thankfully, it seems even Miley draws the line somewhere.

Normal Miley Cyrus
Dane Cook Pic

Cook was asked about the rumors by E! Online today, and he responded with what Dane Cook considers a joke.

"I'm always the last to know these things," he remarked, probably with a high-larious smirk. "Just let Miley know that I'll pick her up for dinner at 8."

Ha! He's the last to know even though the rumor is about him! Where does he come up with this stuff? Oh yeah, he mostly steals it from other comedians.

The bad news is, Dane Cook is still out in the world attempting humor. The good news is, Miley's parents can cancel the plans to force her into rehab.

She might be smoking enough weed to collapse Snoop Dogg's lungs, but the possibility of having sex with Dane Cook presented itself, and she just said no. Clearly, the girl's got a good head on her shoulders.

In fact, we can't think of a better role model for today's kids.

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Miley Cyrus Biography

Miley Cyrus Hair
Miley Cyrus has evolved tremendously over the years. Initially known for portraying Hannah Montana, the singer/actress made an effort to... More »
Franklin, Tennessee
Full Name
Destiny Hope Cyrus

Miley Cyrus Quotes

Thank you guys for all your support. Without you, none of this would be possible. I love every one of you and I could not be more appreciative. God bless you.

Miley Cyrus [at a concert, soon after photo scandal broke]

I have let myself down. I will learn from my mistakes and trust my support team. My family and my faith will guide me through my life's journey.

Miley Cyrus [on lewd photos]