We're assuming Simon is a dude who seriously values his privacy, because Farrah basically lives for attention, yet she's kept her latest romance on the down-low.
Clearly, Saran has insisted that Farrah keep things low-key, but of course, she couldn't help herself from posting some pics of their Valentine's Day visit to a California vineyard.
Most Teen Mom stars would wind up on the local news if you took them someplace with an abundant supply of free alcohol, but booze isn't Ms. Abraham's weakness.
Farrah's more into sex tapes (Read: porn), and it's only a matter of time before she "leaks" one starring herself and Saran and he immediately dumps her, but for now, things appear to be going swimmingly.
Of course, things might not even get that far.
Farrah's returning to Teen Mom for a new season that begins airing next month.
Simon might want to cancel his cable before then if he wants this relationship to last, because once he sees Farrah breaking down and doing that weird whisper-cry thing in every scene, there's no way he'll be able to get an erection in her presence ever again.