Dancing With the Stars Recap: You Have a Very Effective Pelvic Thrust!

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The new season of Dancing With the Stars is upon us!

Last night's premiere showcased the highs, Lowes and in-betweens among the new cast members, who took to the parquet for the first time in most cases.

How did these dance virgins do? Let's break it down!

Kicking it off was Kellie Pickler, who called partner Derek Hough the Peter Pan to her Tinkerbell. Their pixie cuts are similar ... and their moves weren't bad!

Victor Ortiz, meanwhile, looked dashing, but he's got some work to do when it comes to the technical elements. Hey, gotta work the kinks out early.

Ingo Rademacher danced a contemporary routine - a first for the anti-ballroom style on DWTS - but he came through it in the top tier of contestants.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' Lisa Vanderpump, meanwhile, needs to step out of her shell a little bit. She wasn't bad, but was too restrained.

D.L. Hughley, on the other hand? Ouch. When any contestant is told to "go back to the drawing board," you know things could be improved upon.

The youngest competitor in the field, Zendaya, was also the best. Her contemporary routine was enough to top the field easily on this night. Three 8s!

The man, the myth, The Bachelor himself, Sean Lowe, was back in action on ABC, a week after we watched him propose to Catherine on The Bachelor.

"For a dance virgin you have a very effective pelvic thrust," Bruno said of his debut performance, which tells you all you need to know in all honesty.

Aly Raisman, as an Olympian, enters the competition with a certain cachet. All around, the judges thought her cha-cha was a good start, if a little safe.

Dorothy Hamill, another Olympian, sentimental favorite for the judges and a definite competitor, matched Aly with a 21. Are they the ladies to beat?

Wynonna Judd, Kellie's top rival for the country music fan vote, held back a little during her cha-cha, and has some work to do to catch the Pickled one.

Andy Dick, tux and top hat indicating that he meant business, actually turned in a rather respectable foxtrot. We were pretty surprised too, we admit.

Jacoby Jones and Karina Smirnoff closed the show with a promising cha-cha, proving that the Super Bowl might not be the only thing he wins in 2013.

Here's how the DWTS scores stacked up on night one:

  • Zendaya & Val Chmerkovskiy: 24
  • Aly Raisman & Mark Ballas: 21
  • Dorothy Hamill & Tristan MacManus: 21
  • Kellie Pickler & Derek Hough: 21
  • Ingo Rademacher & Kym Johnson: 20
  • Jacoby Jones & Karina Smirnoff: 20
  • Sean Lowe & Peta Murgatroyd: 19
  • Lisa Vanderpump & Gleb Savchenko: 18
  • Victor Ortiz & Lindsay Arnold: 18
  • Wynonna Judd & Tony Dovolani: 18
  • Andy Dick & Sharna Burgess: 17
  • D.L. Hughley & Cheryl Burke: 12

No one gets eliminated this week, so all 12 contestants will be back for another routine next Monday. Who do you want to win? Vote in our poll below!


Dancing with the Stars Quotes

We should have started dancing with one arm waaay before.

Cristian de la Fuente [following his injury, trip to the hospital and subsequent stellar performance]

I am not the best dancer, and I have not been the best dancer from the beginning. I am happy we made it this far.

Cristian de la Fuente