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Emily Maynard said her breakup with Jef Holm was “difficult and heartbreaking” in a statement this week. Sources close to The Bachelorette star say it was anything but.

“Emily just decided she’d had enough,” a source said, adding that she “was extremely miserable, and at her breaking point” toward the end of the relationship.

“She was like ‘I’m dying here, I’m dying here’ … just over it. Enough was enough.”

Emily Maynard's Two Kids

While Bachelorette relationships rarely work out, fans had high hopes for these two, given the apparent depth of their connection. So what went wrong, and so fast?

 

Emily had obvious chemistry with her other two finalists – including current Bachelor-in-waiting Sean Lowe – but opted for Jef with the bigger picture in mind.

Yet, a source close to Jef, who Emily Maynard chose over Lowe and Arie Luyendyk Jr., said his desire to be a father figure to her daughter Ricki deflated over time.

“He has no real connection to Ricki … he doesn’t feel close to her,” the source said, adding Jef thought Emily was an absentee parent, often calling her a “bad mom.”

In addition, Emily receiving filthy texts from NFL backup Matt Leinart further eroded their love, as did her behavior at an August 4 wedding for a Bachelor staff member.

“She was being very flirty,” a guest said, and Jef was “brooding.”

An insider said Emily Maynard‘s “goody-goody Southern Belle” demeanor is just for the cameras: “She flirts with other guys to help her ego. She gets off on it.”

Emily, meanwhile, felt Jef wasn’t mature enough to handle a relationship.

Whatever their reasons, Emily and Jef split up earlier this month, then gradually laid the foundation for the public announcement of the breakup and confirmed it Tuesday.